El Maestro

One evening on the Great Salt Lake

2011-06-27T19:48:00.001-06:00

My partner and I had ourselves an excursion unto the GSL.
A captain was searching for crew to his ship so on board we did set sail.

We came upon the starting line patiently waiting our start.
The flag was raised, away we went racing with all of our heart.

The skipper would yell, "Pull the goddamn halliards!" and I'd pull with all of my might.
I just prayed the red rope I had been pulling was indeed right.

The first mate and I had control of the jib, my partner running the main.
Despite the bumbled mass of confusion, in second place we came.
In the marina drinking our beer, celebrating the race.
With a wink in his eye the captain said, "You weren't a complete disgrace."

We left the marina as the sun went down, it's reflection on the lake.
We stopped to reflect on our evening at sea and for some pictures to take.

Location:S 1210 E,Sandy,United States

Gray Matter

2010-09-26T19:59:00.003-06:00

I am a slave to my organs
I cannot go a day without my bladder calling out
at least 9 times, and that's when I'm dehydrated.

I feel the pangs of hunger roll over me like waves.
It growls, I ignore, it quiets.
Growling a little louder I refuse to listen, then again calm.
My belly shakes the rest of my body, I grab the chips and salsa.

The pain in my tow causes me to hobble around for
several minutes muttering, "Ow ow ow ow ow ow!"
Then of course there is sex, that organ runs my life
more than any other except...

The brain. That one never shuts up.
Always yapping away about all these great ideas,
most of which are completely inconsequential outside the gray matter.
It keeps me awake when I want to sleep.
It talks in different voices like a psychopath.
It argues with itself and feels horrible after a night of drinking, especially tequila.

Yet this gray matter makes sense of the images and sounds I perceive.
Ultimately it is responsible for all my sensations and perceptions.
It finds solutions to many problems.
It allows me to connect with others through language and shared experience.
I am the brain writing through this body to write about myself.
I posses the hand that moves the fingers into doing my bidding.
I am the slave master.
I run the show.

There is one thing that can take over...

instinct.

Mosquito Dharma

2010-08-21T17:33:00.006-06:00

I have a difficult time hating. It seems that "hate" has rarely been in my repertoire of words. Of course I have preferences, likes and dislikes, and that's normal. However, I can say that there is one thing in existence that has taught me how strongly I can hate another creature. Mosquitoes.

They are horrible! Despicable!
Heinous beyond compare.
Those blood sucking fiends
Get through my jeans,
my t-shirt and even my hair! (Well they used to get through my hair)

Parasitic in nature they add nothing of value to the world. Instead, they get fat sucking my blood! They feed past the point of being full, ready to explode.

Carrying west nile, Dengue, malaria,
and countless other diseases
They make people sick
So I'll give 'em a flick
Or a slap whenever I pleases

Mosquitoes give me an itch I don't particularly like to scratch. So what do they offer me? What is their teaching?

I and the mosquito are one
Sucking blood I find quite fun
I drink past my fill
With nary a spill
And leave a big welt when I'm done

*words in green denote the mosquitoes perspective.

I do feed off others, taking advantage of countless people around the world with my choices in food, clothing and any other materials. I use people to my own selfish ends, even when I don't realize it. Especially when I don't realize it. When I'm not feeding from them I feed off my self. I am a glutton.

Am I Buddha nature? Of course!
Eating from pig and human and horse
One big slap to the head
Causes me to be dead
Yet the slapper has no remorse.

I watched as one landed on my arm and pricked me with its needle. I patiently waited, watching as it fed. It extracted its proboscis and flew away. Though it left a welt the welt did not itch.

Allow me to live and do as I may
Don't slap me or swat me or bat me away
I'll do what I please
And leave you at ease
That I might live to suck another day.

As do most living beings on this planet, mosquitoes came from the earth. I love the earth and everything she produces. I love human beings though I hate some of our actions. The most heinous acts come from greed, using other to suit our own selfish desires without regard to the consequences. Perhaps when we finish feeding off each other and give of ourselves to feed others we will have no need for mosquitoes to show us our own parasitic nature. There is also the possibility they will rise up as a cohesive force and attempt to suck us dry. At least we have bug zappers.

Infinity Lake

2010-08-16T13:47:00.002-06:00

Swimming tonight beneath the muffled light of a full moon through the mist
I couldn't tell where the water ended and infinity began.
The moon dotted the water in rivulets of light as fog bridged the gap between water and air.
A loon's song echoes across the lake, on water as still as death.
A song heard through the vastness of space.
I call back and once hear an answer, then silence.
I call again and hear nothing. No response.
The loon knows I am an impostor.

As I lay in bed I hear a boat motor pass through the night air.
Driving a boat in this is insanity.
On the lake I could barely see a meter in front of my face.
How does the driver know where to go?

A wake, the remnant of the boat, crashes against the shore
Followed by another and another
Presents me with the most soothing of sounds
As it lulls me to sleep.

Nine months in the making

2009-12-19T22:15:00.002-07:00

A lot has happened in the past nine months so I'll give you a brief run-down. In May I received Jukai which translates as "to receive the precepts". Basically, I am now officially a Buddhist, akin to a christian baptism. I bowed a lot and vowed to cherish all life, cultivate good, help others, and to be generous, honest and attentive. I affirmed that I am Buddha, I am awake. For pictures please click here. Right after the ceremony, my mom, who had flown out a few days previous, my uncle, who lives in the Salt Lake area, and I drove all night to Gunnison, CO for my sister's graduation. We changed right after we arrived, got some breakfast and proceeded to the ceremony. My brother and aunt had flown into town as well for the occasion. The governor of CO gave a pretty decent commencement speech in the stadium as the Rocky mountains painted the backdrop.

After heading back to SLC I finished up the school year and the summer began. I took a class for my job entitled Understanding Children and Families which gave me some ideas as to why some children act as they do. Other than that I spent a majority of the time pulling weeds, going to the library, playing music, hiking, camping, and a lot of just general gallivanting. In August I made my way back to Colorado for another adventure. A week and a half in Colorado Springs and my birthday celebration at which I became severely intoxicated. Jana, the Czech woman I met in Spain (see Star Peace) flew out the day before and witnessed the event. Struggling to get out of bed the next morning I popped some Aspirin and loaded the last of the equipment in the car. Jana and I were taking a good ol' fashioned road trip in my ex-girlfriend's car. We traveled from Colorado Springs to Durango into Monument Valley and across to Flagstaff, AZ. Proceeding to the Grand Canyon on the day President Obama was there, although we didn't see him, then on to Las Vegas. From there we drove across Death Valley into California. Stopping off at Mammoth for a couple days we next went into Yosemite for some amazing hikes and too many tourists. After Yosemite it was San Francisco where we were able to spend time with my brother before heading up through Napa Valley and on to Northern California and crossing over into Oregon.

This was my first time in Oregon but it will definitely not be my last. I wanted to go to Oregon to determine if I wanted to move there. I am very interested in Portland but all of the state we saw was gorgeous. I love the beaches, I love the green forests, I love the consciousness, I am looking forward to living there. From Portland we drove back to SLC. The entire trip lasted three weeks. I started work again the next day and Jana flew out that evening. For more photos of the trip check out Snapfish.

I had been promoted from Classroom Assistant to Lead Teacher which meant I was responsible for the operation of the class. The Assistant assigned to me had been a preschool teacher for almost twenty years previous so had a lot of experience to draw on. We set up the room and prepared for the students. They arrived one by one and I have subsequently fallen in love with every one of them. Halfway into the school year I am very happy about the way things have unfolded. I love my job and couldn't imagine doing anything else.

Other than the aforementioned activities I have recently passed my second koan if that means anything to you and have become the proud parent of a beautiful baby girl rat. Her name is Skyrocket and I bought her with the intent of taking her to the classroom but she is still a baby. I'm going to let her grow a bit before I take her in. I am now on winter break for two weeks and intend on going into more detail about some of these things later. I guess we'll see where that intention takes me.

ECC and Bribery

2009-03-30T20:17:00.004-06:00

Two weeks ago we had Friday off from work so that we could attend an Early Childhood conference on Saturday. The conference went the way conferences go, generally speaking. The keynote speakers were great and some of the classes were a little helpful but it's not what I would have chosen to spend my Saturday doing. Th following week we were studying Creepy Crawlies in the classroom. Butterfly nets were provided for catching all sorts of insects as well as frogs, salamanders, chameleons, and spiders galore. Since we didn't have our usual Friday teacher workday my lead teacher and I hurried to get as much done as possible the Thursday before to clean the room and change out the dramatic play area. Needless to say, it could have been a lot better. Other than the nets and the animals to catch there was really nothing for them to do.

The next Friday I was by myself because my lead was off for CNA training. We were told by our supervisor that the dramatic play area needed to be a little more... well, dramatic. I spent about an hour cleaning the classroom then went to town on the dramatic play area. I brought in a fake tree from the hallway then went to grab six feet of greet butcher paper. I covered one of the walls with the paper and cut the top to look like grass then put the tree in the corner. On the wall of grass I put a large ant hill complete with tunnels and the queen in the corner with all her eggs. I also cut out dozens of tissue paper butterflies to be tossed in the air and caught in the nets. I then took a pom-pom and wrapped it in pipe cleaners to look like legs. creating a large black spider. The spider was then suspended from the tree.

We are specifically working on number recognition with the children so I made ten large ladybird beetles and added a certain number of dots on one side with its corresponding number on the other. I then cut the beetles in half different ways so the children could match up the halves. I bought some large coffee filters and brought them in on Monday to make butterflies. We decorated the coffee filters then wrapped up the middle with a pipe cleaner to draw in the middle and puff out the sides to look like wings. I encouraged the children to make ants on the anthill using the eraser of a pencil for the body parts and a marker to draw the legs and antennae. They were given markers and the opportunity to draw whatever creepy crawlie creatures they wanted to on the grass wall.

Wednesday morning my supervisor came in and told me that my lead had been admitted to the ER last night. She is ok, don't worry. She is pregnant and was experiencing severe pain so they went to the hospital but both she and the baby are just fine.The point is I would be the lead teacher for the next couple days. Well the morning class went fairly well except for three little boys who were terrorizing everyone and everything but we managed to make it through to the afternoon. The afternoon class was pretty good as well, same sort of situation though. The next day I decided to try some positive reinforcement a.k.a. bribery. Before class began I pulled aside the three boys and showed them a couple other pom-pom spiders I had made specifically for them. I told them that if they listened well and were good examples for their friends they could take home the spiders at the end of the day. I only had to give one warning to two of the boys and told them it was their only warning. Other than that they were all very well behaved, I couldn't believe they were the same children. At the end of class I thanked each of them as they were leaving and gave them their prizes.

In the afternoon class their is a kid of Tongan decent who is much bigger than all the other children in the class. He also has a very difficult time keeping his hands to himself which apparently is common in the culture. He pushes, hits and wraps his arms around other children's necks. Before class on Thursday I told him if he could keep his hands to himself he would be able to take home the spider that had been hanging from the tree. Amazingly enough he didn't touch a single student the entire day. Bribery works. I'm interested in seeing what happens over the course of the next couple weeks. Hopefully the good behavior continues.

Tête, épaules, genoux, et pied, genoux et pieds

2009-03-11T12:01:00.004-06:00

I know I said I would write more often however I have a couple excuses. First, I got really sick with the flu for about two weeks and things just piled up like dirty laundry (which was something that in fact piled up and overflowed out of my hamper). B, two weeks ago was a major deadline for work when many things were due so I spent a lot of time working. Three, I’ve been distracted by snowboarding, sewing, friends, and games. Lastly, I’ve spent my free time just being lazy.

As I said, a couple weeks ago was a major deadline at work. Head Start is a federally funded program so the government likes to know where their money is going. Therefore we are required to keep portfolios for each of the children and provide evidence of their social/emotional, physical, cognitive, and language development. We also need to write anecdotes about how the children fulfill the requirements of a fifty point Creative Curriculum. We also had parent teacher conferences at the same time. I never knew how much paperwork could be involved in teaching preschool.

Every two weeks we switch the theme of the classroom. A few weeks ago our theme was space. We had pictures of planets all around the room, little toy robots and aliens, a cardboard rocket ship, and little spacesuits for the height impaired. We talked about the sun and our position in the solar system. We strung up a paper cone rocket on a string and the children had to figure out how to get it across the room without the use of their hands. I shot off little photo canister alka seltzer rockets. It was a blast.

The next two weeks were focused on the ocean. Water dwelling creatures were posted all along the walls. Fishing poles were given to the children as they fished for fish with fishy numbers on them. I folded paper boats the children colored with markers. The next day we placed the boats in a tub of water to see if they would float. Sure enough, they did… temporarily. With the waves and splashing from the children playing around the boats were soon drenched and sinking to the bottom, the color from the markers melting into the water. At first the water was a beautiful array of colors, then as they mixed it became a murky brown. My friend Mel who works at the aquarium came in to do some activities with the children turning a couple of them into bullfrogs that ate the rest of the children as an example of an endemic species.

Following our ocean theme we are now in the middle of a fantasy/fairy tale setup. A large castle is hanging up on the wall in front of a small puppet theatre. In my best Swedish chef impersonation I took a chef puppet and chased after one of the pigs trying to make bacon. It is a good thing that it was only fantasy as I would never do such a thing in real life. The kids got a kick out of it though. We tell stories like Jack and the Beanstalk which comes complete with a tiny Jack, a tiny giant, and a tiny giant beanstalk.

I have taken my guitar into the class twice now to sing songs like This Little Light of Mine, Puff the Magic Dragon and Down by the Bay. I also introduced the children to Head, Shoulders, Knees and Feet in French. Now they are moving and singing in a second, or for many a third, language. It is pretty cool.

I am really enjoying my job. I can’t think of any other profession I would rather be in. I don’t spend all my time working though, as it might sound. I actually have very active yoga and Buddhist practices. I attend a Power Hour yoga class twice a week and sitting meditation once a week. I am also in the process of sewing a rakasu. A rakasu is a bib-looking thing that hangs around my neck during meditation. I am sewing it so that I might receive jukai in May. Jukai is translated into receiving the precepts. So in May I will officially be considered a Buddhist.

All in all, life is pretty great. I really appreciate that I have so many things to be thankful for. I am healthy, I have a nice place to live in a pretty cool city, I have a great job (especially nice with an economy in such a state), and spring is on its way. Hooray!

Head, shoulders, knees and toes, kness and toes

2009-01-09T13:21:00.006-07:00

After two weeks of work I had three weeks of winter vacation. The first week I spent lazing around the apartment or taking trips to the library. The second and third weeks I spent back in Colorado Springs with the family. My sister was in town as well as my brother and his girlfriend. Only the second he's brought home to meet the family so I'm sure we scared the hell out of her. The two of them seem very happy together so I'm very happy for them. I went to downtown Colorado Springs with a few of the regular CSers, a couple new ones, and Big Ben who I had not seen in over seven years. It was a good night ending with Denny's at 3:30 in the morning.

I came back to Salt Lake City and went back to school. I would like to say that I really love my job. The teacher I work with is really nice and has things pretty together. The kids are great in that there are no overt troublemakers and they are all pretty fun to play with. The money is pretty sweet too. Its been two and a half years since I've had a job that pays. My first paycheck was more than I had made in those two and a half years combined.

When at the preschool I love getting into what the kids are doing. Yesterday I was finger painting and playing patient to a group of 4 year old doctors. They determined that I was in the hospital because I was having a baby. After giving me a few shots of God knows what and putting me on oxygen I successfully gave birth. One of my "doctors" wrapped up a blanket and handed it to me. "She's a beautiful baby girl" she told me. "Thank you, you were an excellent doctor" I replied.

The day before we were using shaving cream, glue, water colors, and googly eyes to paint faces on paper plates. That was a very messy assignment but probably some of the most fun I've had getting my hands dirty since my last girlfriend. On nice days we take the children outside and with all the snow we've been able to build snowmen and women, make snow angels and throw snowballs at the broad side of a barn (occasionally missing). On inclement weather days or when it is too cold we go to the gym which smells as most gyms do of sweaty socks and urine. I'll run around with the kids and throw them down on the mats until they wear me out.

All in all, it is a pretty good workout between throwing around 50 pound children and performing "Head, shoulders, knees and toes" as fast as possible and going on a "Bear Hunt". I really believe that if I am to have a job this is the best one for me. I am very happy playing the role of a teacher. I hope to do this for quite awhile.

My 7 year-old roommate

2008-12-16T14:00:00.004-07:00

Alright, I know I've been horrible at keeping this thing up to date. And I have no excuse being that I live in a city where there are multiple computers and internet available to me. I mean, its not like I'm in the middle of the Mexican desert or anything. I'll try to keep more current in my entries. So far I've been writing like I was writing for chapters in a book. I realize that people are probably less interested in sitting at a computer to read a book a chapter every two to three months than they are to just read a short blog post update. Plus, we tend to seek instant gratification from technology these days, as is the intent. However, I know I still appreciate having a book in my hands to read at my leisure. So for now I'll give a brief update of what has happened since my last post.

Another guy moved into KC's house, one of her son's friends from culinary school in the city for his internship. He was paying KC $300 each month for rent. KC hadn't been charging me rent up to that point, she told me I could stay with them for a month for no charge, but the month was quickly coming to an end . In the past two months of searching I had yet to find work. I couldn't afford to pay that so I asked the HPs if I could move back in with them and the boys. Although Riley had taken the room downstairs where I had been staying, they of course welcomed me back in. I wasn't paying rent but I also had a seven year-old roommate. It wasn't one of the best arrangements in my life but it worked.

I spent my time riding around, playing WiiFit until I was sick of it, meditating at Kanzeon, watching full seasons of Six Feet Under, playing around with the kids, and job searching. At one point I even took a tour of the UPS facility to be a package handler but didn't take the job. During this time Halloween came upon us. I had been planing a costume for the past month or so. I had bought the most 70s looking clothes I could find at the thrift store, I wore a blonde afro borrowed from Robin, and painted my face to look like a skull. I had transformed into the Death Of Disco. I attended a couple of parties and had a blast at them. A week later my friend Patrick from the Zen Center offered me a room in his two-bedroom apartment for rent. He even said I could stay for a reduced rent until I found a job so I took him up on his offer. I moved in with Patrick as soon as I could. He lives a block and a half from the TRAX line and about six blocks from Kanzeon so it is a great location.

The week after I moved in with him I volunteered at Kanzeon to be the assistant cook for the sesshin. Making meal after meal for 60 people is a difficult task and it takes a whole kitchen staff to get it done. Halfway through the week I received a phone call from Snowbird Ski School offering me a job as a ski/snowboard instructor. I accepted the job and prepared to spend a season on the slopes. About two hours after I accepted the job I received a phone call from the Head Start preschool offering me a classroom assistant position I had interviewed for. Now, I had a decision to make but was prepared to make it. I decided to go with the Head Start job. I called Snowbird back and renounced the instructor position.

Now, I know many of you would say, "Why the hell would you give up a snowboard instructing position to be a preschool teacher?" Not only was the money better in being a preschool teacher, not to mention the excellent benifits, I was looking forward to the idea of teaching young children in a community that is of the lowest socioeconomic class in Salt Lake City. The area is composed of many Hispanic families as well as several immigrants. This gives me the opportunity to help in an area where I can do a lot of good. A free pass to a resort didn't seem to be worth that.

I went home to Colorado for Thanksgiving and when I returned I started my new job. More on that later. I worked for two weeks and then school ended for winter break. Not a bad schedule, I thought, two weeks of work followed by three weeks off. I could handle this.

This is just a picture of the Mormon temple and Headquarters I took while waiting for the tram. I thought the sunset had some pretty colors.

2008-10-21T12:15:00.004-06:00

The weekend after I returned from Alaska, my sister, Christina, had a couple of soccer games up in Colorado Springs. We went to her game at the Air Force Academy then spent the evening with her before we all went up to Boulder for her game the next day. Since we would already be in Boulder, my parents and I decided that we would drive up to Estes Park afterwards and stay the night there. After Christina’s game we did just that. After driving up the pass we crested the hill overlooking the town at the foot of the Rocky Mountains. Driving across the bridge that separated the North and South sides of a shimmering azure lake we spotted something that looked vaguely like the Loch Ness Monster. Upon closer inspection we realized that it was the Loch Ness Monster, of the inflatable variety. We looked up and saw why. A huge banner shuttered with the wind which read “2008 Scottish/Irish Heritage Festival”. The three of us looked at each other and immediately knew what the other two were thinking. “Hooray! Kilts and bagpipes!” There was no way we could turn that down.

We parked the car and wandered up the hill amidst sticky, cotton-candy faced kids, and guys you wouldn’t want to see bend over. Following the sounds of the forlorn (bagpipes if you will) and the smell of Guinness we made our way through the festival. To our left dog’s catching Frisbees off their owners’ backsides. To our right were rows of tents representing the various clans. With our pints of Guinness in one hand and kettle corn in our other, we wandered through the tents and listened to more bagpipers. We had come at the end of the festival so after only an hour and a half they were having their closing ceremony complete with 102, you guessed it, bagpipes. Tents were packed up and free kettle corn distributed. We left and searched for a hotel room. We found one in a beautiful hotel on the lake. Our room had a balcony that looked out over the lake to the gorgeous mountains shooting up into the sky just beyond. After a really bad Mexican dinner I just sat on that balcony and watched the moon flicker off the ripples in the lake.

The next day we drove up into Rocky Mountain National Park. Immediately after paying our entry fee we looked off to our left and saw a herd of about thirty elk. Driving further in we saw even more. We drove further into the mountains before we parked the car and took a hike. Passing towering walls of sheer rock colored elephant grey we made our way along the arduous trail. Occasionally we would make hydration stops or take in the awe-inspiring scenery. Crystal clear lakes shimmered under the bright blue sky and brilliantly reflected the magnificence surrounding them. After a full day of mountains, lakes, waterfalls, and chipmunks my parents and I made our way back down to the car. We ate dinner at a Nepalese restaurant before driving back down south along the Front Range to arrive home again.

I stayed in Colorado for about two more weeks before heading up to Denver to catch my westbound train. During this time I went to the local Goodwill and treated myself to a whole new wardrobe so that my hemp pants aren’t the only pants I own anymore and my shirts actually have buttons. The day before I left, Nieve, Michael, Amanda, my mom, and I took a tour of Boulder beer breweries. Several hours and many beers into it we were all nice and toasted. Besides for a half gallon of beer being spilt on me I would say that it was a pretty successful tour of the Boulder breweries. As the sun rose the next morning it was quite difficult to raise up off Nieve’s couch and prepare for the next leg of my journey. At the train station I checked in my luggage and said goodbye to my mother. After a hug and a kiss I boarded the locomotive. I sat down in my seat and watched the beautiful Colorado scenery change into the rugged yet equally beautiful landscape of Utah. By the time it arrived in Salt Lake City the train was an hour and a half late, but it did arrive.

Kim was waiting there for me as I stepped off the train. It was after midnight and she was wearing a hat (something I never see her do) so I didn’t even recognize her as I walked right past to my luggage. I turned around to see if she had arrived when this little guy in a Newsies hat and glasses walks right up to me and I realize that its no little guy at all, it is little Kim. She helped me get my stuff into the car and we drove back to their house. While I was away they moved Riley and his things downstairs into the room I was using but it was also still kind of the guest room as the futon was still spread out next to his bed after Ruth’s mom had just come to visit. I lay down and fell asleep. The next morning Kim and Casey came down to wake Riley from school. As soon as he came in the room and saw me, Casey had the biggest grin on his little face. He woke Riley and Riley turned his head in my direction. He had no idea what was going on but was enjoying it anyway.

The boys went to school, Ruth went to work and I was alone in the house I had left three months prior with no intention of returning anytime soon. I had time to gather myself and get in touch with my surroundings before reassembling my bicycle. By gathering myself I mean beating all of the top scores on WiiFit. Now Ruth is mad at me. On Sunday I went to the Zen Center and felt like I was back home. People were happy to see me and most were very pleased I hadn’t left for South America. Afterwards I went to another lesbian couple’s house to help them take care of their three year-old daughter Julia. I was to stay with them throughout the week and look after her while one of her moms worked and the other was out of town. Julia is a brilliant little girl with a strong will and able mind. She has an excellent vocabulary for a girl of three and I can imagine her becoming a great leader someday, like Wonder Woman. (What? She was a great leader with that awesome invisible jet and unbreakable lasso.)

After spending a week with the soon-to-be superhero I moved over to my friend’s house overlooking the great salt lake valley where I’ve spent the last two weeks continuously looking for employment, organizing refrigerators and pantries, cutting hedges, and getting lost in hours upon hours of Grand Theft Auto 4. What a life, eh? For now I’m waiting, meditating, making music, searching and killing lots of drug dealers. What’s next is anybodies guess.

Episode IVX: The Mormon Empire Strikes Back

2008-09-11T17:30:00.008-06:00

Robin and I said our good-byes in Gunnison and I watched her roll away in her car with Gyro sticking his head up and watching me through the back window as they passed out of sight. I sat down on the front porch of my sister’s house and cried. I had never cried so hard in my life. I spent the next couple days in Gunnison with my sister rafting on the river, bicycling the rocks, getting drunk, and watching movies. When I was ready to leave I packed up all my gear onto my bicycle and said goodbye to my sister. I made my way east, determined to bicycle back to Colorado Springs. As the day wore on I found myself peddling through the plains as the sun rose higher in the sky heating up the earth. Early that afternoon I arrived at the foot of Monarch Pass. Drudgingly I peddled one foot after the other and made my way slowly up the mountain. Rain sprinkled down on me providing a refreshing temperature as my muscles were straining against the pedals. After about three hours of climbing I reached the top. I turned around and looked at the gorgeous valley below me grateful that it was behind me. I stopped off for a snack then started coasting down the other side of the mountain. After only about twenty minutes or so I was off the mountain and out into the valley on the other side of Monarch.

As I made my way through the second valley the sun was beginning to set behind the mountains and I set out to find a place to sleep. I happened upon a house that had been put up for sale. The windows were dark, the inside furniture was gone, the doors were locked, and there was no sign of anyone coming in or out for awhile. Around the side of the house I found a small awning which I set up camp beneath. I slept fairly well to awake the next morning as the sun slowly climbed above the mountain range to the east of me. I got back on the bike and continued on my way. While riding along the highway I noticed hundreds of prairie dog holes on the side of the road, each with a prairie dog poking its head out or standing up to watch me as I rode by. I could swear that while riding past one even waved to me with its little paw. I spent the whole day climbing as I ascended the hills of the next pass. Coming down out of the pass I arrived in the South Park Valley. In a car it takes about thirty minutes to cross this valley. On my bike I spent the next three hours rolling along the flat plains fighting the wind coming at my face and trying to stay hydrated without finding any shade providing relief from the sweltering sun. On my way up the pass out of the valley I heard intense thunder from the storm clouds rolling in behind me. I glanced behind me to see the thunderclouds threatening me. Nearing the top of the pass it began to rain. I continued on until I reached the visitor center at the very top and as I was riding under the cover hail started to pelt the ground around me. I had made it to shelter just in time. I waited there as a majority of the storm passed. I called my mom to let her know I was ok and she offered to meet me in Divide, a small town about thirty miles away. I agreed to that and made my way out into the dwindling rain. Three hours later I arrived at the proposed meeting place and she arrived soon thereafter. Two days and one hundred fifty miles after I had left Gunnison I was exhausted. We got back to my parents’ house and I subsequently passed out.

I spent the next couple weeks with my parents doing various odd jobs around the house until it was time for me to head up to the Denver area for my friend Nieve’s wedding. I got a ride with my friend Amanda and we arrived in Thornton five days before the ceremony. Over the course of the next few days people were arriving left and right to stay at the house culminating with twelve people staying in a three bedroom house. We spent the days preparing for the wedding and the evenings already celebrating with alcoholic drinks freely flowing. The bachelor and bachelorette parties were held Thursday night (no nudity involved) with the rehearsal Friday morning. We all woke up very reluctantly Friday and figured out what we would do for the ceremony itself. After the rehearsal Sara (the maid of honor), Nieve (the bride), and I (the Will-of Honor) went to a nail salon and each had manicures and pedicures. I had never known the secret women were hiding behind those perfectly, pedicured toenails. Having my feet massaged I basked in the scents of heady nail polish aroma. The little Vietnamese woman massaging my feet applied green and blue nail polish to the big toes of each foot and covered the rest of my toenails in bright green. I had the same color for my fingers as I figured with an Irish groom I should have some green accents.

That night we had the rehearsal dinner consisting of pizza and wine for forty people at Nieve’s family home. The next day we returned to the Montaño family household for the bridal shower during which I lost the contest for prettiest bride in a toilet paper bridal gown. After the shower we finished some last minute preparations and made our way to a hotel. I shared a room with the other four members of the bridal party (all women, thank you very much). We woke up in the morning jumping up and down on Nieve’s bed shouting, “YOU’RE GETTING MARRIED TODAY!!” and proceeded to get ready for the wedding. Kiki, the cake baker, put my hair into two French braids so that I resembled Legolas from Lord of the Rings. We dropped Nieve to have her hair done while we raced to put together any last minute details. We picked her up when she was done and rushed to the event center where the ceremony was being held. After a lot of commotion and running around it was time to begin. Despite certain complications with music and microphone inconsistencies the wedding went well and was extremely beautiful. Nieve looked amazing in her dress which her grandma had made by hand. Michael looked spiffy in his tuxedo with green converse.

After the ceremony came the reception. It was one of the good ones, with lots of dancing and drinks flowing. Nieve then tossed her bouquet to a group of waiting women who tried to act as though they weren’t interested in being the next to get married. It turns out the flowers fell into the hands of a fifteen year-old whose mother wasn’t thrilled at the idea of a proposal any time soon. Then it was the guys turn. We all watched as Michael, blindfolded, removed a piece of his new wife’s undergarments. As he stood up with the garter in hand and still blindfolded he snapped the elastic and sent the garter flying. It hit me square in the chest and fell into my hands. Crazy rituals. Soon after the party died down we all went our separate ways. I and a few other party members remained around for the next few days as we said good-bye to friends and family. Then, I myself said farewell and boarded an airplane.

I was bound for Alaska. One of my best friends from high school, Steph (pronounced Steve), is stationed way up in Fairbanks and I decided to pay him a visit. I arrived in Anchorage late Thursday night and stayed with a guy thanks to CouchSurfing.com. Friday morning he took me out to the highway and dropped me off wishing me luck. I was hitchhiking my way up to Denali National Park where Steph was going to meet me. I managed to hitch a few rides and eventually made it to the visitor center where I saw Steph sitting on a bench out front. We found a place to camp, set up our tent and went for a hike around the area. The next morning we awoke and made our way up into the park. On the way up we saw several cars stopped on the other side of the road. A few seconds later we realized why. On our side of the road, right in front of us was a medium-sized grizzly bear eating berries and digging at the roots along the ditch right next to the road. We stopped and took a few pictures before moving on. We parked the car and went for a hike down a path near the Savage River. Along the way we came across a group of Ptarmigans, a bird akin to chickens and quail. About nine of them stood blocking our path and we had to weave our way through nearly kicking them out of the way. We saw a heard of Daal sheep on the ridge of a mountain that appeared as little white puffs with horns. Near the top of the path we saw a funny looking grey and brown creature that resembled a large groundhog. It was a marmot and as I got closer to take a closer look it stuck its head up, looked at me, and charged my way diverting at the last second without touching me. I was nearly mauled by fifteen pounds of relentless, furry, claws and sharp, pointy teeth.

After our hike we drove up to Fairbanks and went to a party at one of his Air Force friends’ house on the base. I arrived with pigtails and painted finger nails. The clean-cut military guys had no idea how to react. We played beer pong and Halo and just had a good ol’ time. While Steph worked I stayed at his place playing video games, riding a bicycle, and touring around North Pole, Alaska where he lives. We went to my uncle’s house for dinner one night as he lives in Fairbanks as well. I lost my vegan status for a day because he cooked us King Salmon on an open bit barbecue with smoked Alder wood. It was so incredibly tasty. The night before I left Steph and I went to some beautiful hot springs and had some great bonding time that we haven’t shared in many years. The next day I got a ride back to Anchorage with two girl friends of Steph’s. Through the car ride we told jokes and I played music. I think I’ve got the start of an entourage now. I hopped on my plane and took the red-eye back to Colorado.

I’m back in Colorado for a couple more weeks before returning to Salt Lake City. I have decided to postpone the bicycling trip to South America, at least for the time being. It wasn’t shaping up the way I was hoping it would and I think I could do this trip a lot smarter sometime in the future, especially after improving my Spanish. For now I will return to the beautiful city by the salty lake and find a job. I’m really hoping to do some form of social work, particularly in the adoption field so if anyone has any advice or hook-ups please let me know. Salt Lake City, here I come… again.

Saying Goodbye

2008-07-21T11:02:00.016-06:00

I began going to the Kanzeon Zen Center on a regular basis. I would sit meditation on Wednesday nights, attend the Sunday morning Dharma talks, and volunteer every Friday. Volunteering involved painting walls, gardening, cleaning, and any other odd jobs they had for me. I began meeting all sorts of fascinating people from George, the British poet gardener with the body of a 70-year-old but the soul of a teenager, to Christian, the German who up and moved his entire family to Salt Lake City from Germany just to study under the abbot at Kanzeon. Incidentally, the abbot of Kanzeon, Genpo Merzel Roshi, is world famous for the techniques he has developed through his experience with Zen. The technique is called Big Mind and is a form of psychotherapy with the aspect of Buddhism added in. It is amazing to sit in on a Sunday session and watch people just click with enlightenment as he or any of the other teachers lead us in Big Mind.

One Sunday morning I was sitting in Kanzeon with Vee and our friend Corrine as we listened to one of the Sensei’s gave a talk. After the talk, we all gathered downstairs for tea and cookies. Corrine and Vee started talking with a cute young woman and I joined in on the conversation. The young woman’s name was Robin. We all chatted for a while before we left Kanzeon. We were on our way to take Vee to get her first tattoo. We took her to the tattoo parlor and set her up with the artist and her design. The artist got to work and Corrine and I left them to it. Robin had invited us to coffee with a group she attends on a regular basis so Corrine and I took her up on the offer. Arriving at the coffee shop, we saw Robin and a couple other people gathered in the corner so we walked over and sat down. The whole time there, I was engaging Robin in conversation and trying to get any sort of feel about whether she was interested in me or not. After an hour or so of conversation, I still had no idea. We said goodbye then Corrine and I left to check on Vee. After a few more hours of tattooing, the permanent art on her back was complete. A transgender symbol with the words LOVE IS THE MOVEMENT circling within. It was beautifully done and very fitting for Vee.

A couple weeks passed by uneventfully while I occupied my time volunteering at the elementary school still and Kanzeon riding my bike to and from everywhere I went. Then my mom decided to come out to visit. She had heard me talking so much about Kanzeon and the Big Mind process and wanted to check it out for herself. She arrived on Thursday evening and I picked her up at the airport (in a borrowed car, not my bicycle). Over the next couple of days her brother, who lives in Salt Lake City, drove us around and the three of us hung out together. On Sunday morning the three of us went to the Zen Center and listened to a visiting Sensei from France give a talk on loving ourselves completely. Afterwards we had tea and cookies and saw Robin there again. I introduced her to my mom and uncle and invited her on a bike ride the next week. After agreeing to do so we parted ways and my uncle, mom, and I drove out to Antelope Island on the Great Salt Lake. While touring the island we saw herds of antelope and buffalo but the second we stepped out of the car we were attacked by no-see-um bugs that ate away at our flesh. Needless to say we spent most of the tour inside the car.

The next day my mom and I attended the Big Mind workshop at Kanzeon and she loved it. She and Genpo Roshi seemed to connect really well and she shared many things I never expected to hear from her. The next day Robin came over and she, my mom and I got on our bikes and made our way to a trail along the Jordan River. About ten miles into the ride my mom was getting tired and decided to head back so Robin and I continued alone. We had a good time riding and talking and did not turn around for another hour or so. When we arrived back at the house I made us all lunch. After lunch, my mom went to rest and Robin and I went out into the back yard. I laid down a blanket and brought out my guitar. I started playing for her and I saw tears start streaming down her face. After playing a few songs I set down my guitar, leaned over, and kissed her and I felt her lips passionately pressing back against mine. We were there on the blanket in the grass holding each other and kissing for what seemed like hours. Then she got up, said goodbye, kissed me, and left. I wouldn’t see her again for another week because she was heading to a conference in Southern California.

The next day I took my mom to the airport and dropped her off for her plane. I couldn’t stop thinking of Robin. While she was in California she called me and we talked on the phone for a long time. I figured out she was thinking a lot about me too. When she returned we started spending more and more time together. She would bring her Greyhound, Gyro, over and we would baby sit the boys together. Gyro is a four-year-old retired racer who is more afraid of two-year-old Casey than anything else in the world. It almost seemed as though Robin was torturing him by bringing him over to see the child. The more time Robin and I spent together the more we realized that this was the relationship we had both been looking for. The only problem was that I was leaving Salt Lake City at the end of June so we knew this was a long-term thing.

Robin took a trip to meet her family in Florida to watch a shuttle launch. While there, she let me use her car back in SLC. One morning I strapped my bike to the back of her car and made my way to the south side of Immigration Pass. I hopped on my bicycle and started heading up. Immigration Pass is so named because it was where the Mormons entered the Salt Lake City Valley. I climbed and climbed and climbed as the mountain became steeper and steeper. About two and a half hours later, I reached the peak of White Mountain. I stopped to take in the view and eat a sandwich I had prepared earlier then started down. Approximately twenty minutes later I found myself at the bottom. I have been riding around so much and pushing myself hard in order to prepare for my next adventure. In September, I am going to ride my bicycle to South America. This is the reason why I was leaving SLC in June. I wanted to spend a couple months in Colorado before heading out.

When Robin retuned from Florida we started preparing for a camping trip we would take the next week, right after Pride Weekend. Being intimately involved with a lesbian couple and their boys as well as having several homosexual friends Pride is almost as big an event for me as it is for them. Friends came into town that I had not seen in a few years, some not since I graduated from college. On Friday, Robin and I went for a hike in Little Cottonwood Canyon with my friend Michael. I hadn’t seen Michael in about two years and he and I were best friends in college. Saturday evening we went to the Pride grounds and danced to some great music. Sunday morning Robin and I went to Kanzeon together and the topic of the Dharma speech was impermanence. The facilitator asked to speak with our self that was going to die in three years. Speaking as the self that has three years to live puts many things into perspective. It shows what matters in your life and what you would accomplish if you knew you only had that long to live. He then asked to speak to the self that would die in three months followed by the one that would die in three weeks. When we came to that point I realized that I only had about three weeks left in SLC and that meant I had three weeks left with Robin. Therefore, this relationship was going to die in three weeks time. I started pouring my heart out and telling Robin how much I loved and cherished her. When I had finished the facilitator looked at us and said, “Wow, I know pronounce you husband and wife.” In true Zen fashion, it was completely unexpected.

After the talk, Robin and I joined up with the Hackford-Peers at Pride. As Casey napped Robin and I took Riley for a walk around the festivities and telling everyone we knew that we had been married that morning. We said that had we known before hand, we would have invited them. My mom completely flipped when I told her the news. Of course, she calmed down after I told her the whole story. The next day, Robin and I left on our “honeymoon”. We were dog sitting for a friend and took her black lab with us as Robin, Gyro, Jack (the lab), and I drove down to Southern Utah to go camping. We found a beautiful, remote camping spot about halfway between Zion National Park and Bryce Canyon. We stayed in a park called Deer Haven and it was gorgeous. We hiked around the area through groves of aspen trees and meadows of wildflowers before settling in for the night back at the campground. The next day we left the dogs at the campsite and drove to Bryce Canyon. We spent the day hiking in the exhausting heat around the many hoodoos and rock formations of Bryce.

We returned to the campsite, got the dogs, and drove further down the road to find a beautiful little lake where the dogs and we took a little swim. Returning to the campgrounds, I took the dogs to play fetch. Jack would run mercilessly back and forth after the tennis ball only too excited to have me throw it again. Gyro on the other hand had no interest in chasing inanimate objects. He was definitely happy chasing Jack though. Jack would take off running for the ball with Gyro following close behind then Gyro would kick in his speed and pass Jack as if he were standing still. He would run all the way back to me before Jack had even reached the ball. Then he would be exhausted and just stand there as I threw the ball for Jack another twenty to thirty times. The following morning Robin and I left the dogs again and made out way to Zion. We hiked up the most thrilling hike there called Angel’s Landing. It is five miles round-trip with an elevation gain of 1,488 feet up sheer cliffs with steep drop-offs. It was an amazing climb with a gorgeous view of the entire park from the top. After checking out the Weeping Wall and other sites along the Virgin River, we left Zion and had a romantic at a restaurant surrounded by the red cliffs of Southern Utah. The next day we packed up the car and the dogs and headed home.

Riley was out of school by this point and we spent most of the next two weeks together. We rode bicycles almost everyday, played with Lego’s, fought each other with light sabers as Jedi’s, and swam at the swimming pool; you know, a typical boy’s summer day. Robin and I also took Riley camping during this time, which was his first-ever camping trip. It took a lot of work to convince his moms to let him go. We took him to American Fork Canyon, just south of Salt Lake City. We did all the usual camping activities including hiking, building a fire, roasting marshmallows, and playing the wooden flute. He loved it. By the end of that week it was time for me to leave Salt Lake City. Robin was actually heading east on a long road trip so she was going to take me to Colorado. Saying goodbye to the Hackford-Peers was one of the most difficult things I’ve had to do. Riley was bawling the entire night but managed to choke back enough tears to give me a gift. Out of his pocket, he drew two rocks, one with the word LOVE written on it and the other with the word FAMILY. He told me to chose one and the one I chose I would take with me on my travels. He would keep the other and whenever either of us missed the other we would squeeze the rock and remember all the fun we had together. As he went to bed, I laid there with him until he fell asleep, then I went and said my goodbyes to the rest of the family. We all cried together and gave each other big hugs. Vee and Corrine were there as well so they were witness to the entire event.

Driving back to Robin’s place with her that night I couldn’t stop crying. I can’t believe how much heartache I caused a six year-old boy and how much I hurt from leaving him. That night Robin and I talked and cried in each other’s arms. The next morning we got in the car and made our way to Colorado. We made it to my parent’s house late that evening and crashed, completely exhausted. Gyro loved being at my parent’s place. There was enough space to run while dodging the trees spotted all around. We spent the weekend with my parents and other family members who were in town visiting. The day before Robin left to continue her road trip she asked if I would come along. She was going to the Lake of the Ozarks to spend the 4th of July with some friends before she drove up to Wisconsin to see her folks. I thought that since she had met my parents it was only fitting that I met hers so I agreed to join her.

We drove east from Colorado Springs into Kansas and spent the night at a campground along a lake. I never knew Kansas could be pretty but we managed to find some beauty. Continuing on we made our way to Missouri and wound up at the Lake of the Ozarks. Arriving at the lake, we were given a glimpse into a present day version of the movie Wall-E which we had seen just before we left. The shore of the lake was littered with houses right up against the shore and right next to one another. Each had its own little boathouse with a big speedboat inside. The campground consisted of RV after RV, each one bigger than the next. Each RV came equipped with its own pink flamingos and Wal-Mart porch furniture. Every person there also had his or her own golf cart in which to roll around. Although the campsite was only about a half mile long we hardly saw anyone walking or riding bikes but we saw countless people in their own little golf carts. I am sure they were working up their appetite for the meal-in-a-cup they would have later that evening. We met up with Robin’s friends and hung out on the lake with them amidst the other hundreds of boaters. We watched the fireworks above the lake from the boat with the reflections bouncing off the water as each exploded.

The day following the celebration Robin and I got Gyro back in the car and we made our way north to Wisconsin to visit her parents. Robin’s parents have a house on a lake there, which was night and day different from the Lake of the Ozarks. The lake was very calm and placid with little activity. Most of the houses were built off the shoreline so the shore was still beautiful and untouched. The morning after we arrived Robin’s dad took us up in his seaplane and we did a few passes on the lake scaring the hell out of the anglers in their little boat. When we returned to the house, we got out the sailboat, a full-mast Laser, and I took it out onto the lake. Being an inexperienced sailor on a one-man boat with an inconsistent wind was quite challenging. I spent more time in the water than on the boat. Almost as soon as I got it turned upright and got in it, the boat tipped over again. This continued until Robin and her dad came to my rescue with the pontoon boat. Her dad hopped into the sailboat as I took a rest on the pontoon. He made his way up and down the lake with no problems making it look so easy. He invited me back into the boat and we sailed for a little while together.

Later, Robin and I got into the canoe and paddled our way to a lagoon on one side of the lake. Countless lily pads were spread out within the lagoon. We returned home and the next day her parents took us into Minneapolis to the science museum for the Star Wars exhibit. It was very difficult for me to stop making light saber noises but then Robin gave me one of those looks that told me if I did not quit she would pretend she didn’t know me for at least a week. While in Wisconsin, we also took Robin’s grandma to a bald eagle preserve. We saw an eagle munching down on a rat and learned a lot about these symbols of American pride. About four days after we had arrived in Wisconsin we got back in the car and made our way west again. We stopped to spend the night in Nebraska and shortly after we had set up the tent large clouds formed on the horizon. An hour later we were hit by a massive thunderstorm. The sides of the tent were folding completely on top of us as the wind blew strong. Lightning lit up the tent at such a constant pace it seemed almost like daylight as thunder clapped all around us. Robin, Gyro, and I huddled as close together as humanly (and dogly) as possible. Eventually the storm passed and we were able to sleep, fortunate enough to have the tent still standing and internally dry.

We arrived the next day back in Colorado but stayed in the Denver area with my friend Nieve and her fiancé Michael. The next day we went back to my parents’ house in Colorado Springs. We spent the next couple of days there while I bought supplies for my South America trip, then we left the Springs and drove to Gunnison, Colorado, where my sister lives. We rode our bicycles around the north rim of Black Canyon and hiked around the Crested Butte area to Emerald Lake. While hiking we were caught in a huge storm that poured down rain and hailed. This day was actually our last together as Robin was leaving me the next day to return to Salt Lake City so it was fitting that we were soaked by the rain. The next day we packed up her car and said our goodbyes. We hugged, kissed, and cried not knowing when we would see each other again. I was devastated as I watched her drive away. We had only known each other for two and a half months but it seemed as though we packed six months worth of a relationship into those.

I had never been in a relationship like the one I had with Robin. We were so open and honest with each other that things were revealed that I would have never told anyone else. It was just so easy to open up to her when I knew she would not judge me for the way I felt or the things I thought. Had I not made up my mind to travel to South America I would have found it so easy to return with her to SLC. Unfortunately, this was it. The best relationship I’ve ever had I gave up for the pursuit of my own fantasy. As much as I hope to be with her again when I return, I have absolutely no idea what will be there when I get back. I have spent the last couple of days since she left in what feels like a state of shock. It is almost as though my brain doesn’t quite comprehend what I have given up. I do miss her but this is what we knew was going to happen. That doesn’t make it any easier though. I feel as though Colorado Springs has been my home for so long that I didn’t realize I was looking for a new home. I made a place for myself in Salt Lake City with friends and an amazing relationship. I can only hope and dream that someday I will return and rebuild that home for myself, whether in SLC or somewhere else. Until then I will continue my adventure.

Home, home on the Wasatch Range

2008-04-07T10:26:00.016-06:00

Salt Lake City is a very easy city to navigate through, unless you grew up on the front range of Colorado. The streets of the city are based upon a grid system with the Mormon Temple at the middle and then streets spreading out into each of the four cardinal directions. The only problem with this system, from a Coloradan standpoint, is that the mountains are to the East. To see the sun rise above the mountains in the morning is very disturbing since I always perceived the mountains silhouetted against the backdrop of the setting sun. Due to this one pertinent aspect it took a couple weeks for me to get my bearings.

Almost immediately after I arrived in the city the one pair of pants I owned began to show signs of extreme wear. This was probably due to the fact that I spent a lot of time on my hands and knees following a two year-old around the house. Rough-housing with a six year-old takes its toll as well. I decided it was time for a new pair and went out on a search for them. After searching several stores and not finding any hemp clothing I looked into one last store, the Dancing Crane. They were out of stock on their hemp clothing, I was out of luck. While at the Dancing Crane I did find out that there was a Tibetan Buddhist monastery in town and decided to check it out. I went to the monastery and attended an hour long meditation session. Some people may not consider sitting for an hour not thinking about thinking to be a lot of fun but I highly enjoyed it. I have been meditating for about two years now and find it very beneficial. After meditating I returned home and ordered a pair of hemp pants online. About a week later I bent over to pick up a pencil off the floor and the pants I was wearing split completely in half revealing to Kim and Ruth the brightness of my white ass. Averting their eyes they prayed that my new pants came quickly. As it so happens, the pants arrived that day just in time for Ruth, the boys and I to head out to the small town of Roosevelt to visit Ruth’s family.

Meeting the Hackford clan is an outrageous event for even the strongest of individuals. Ruth’s mother, like many grandmothers, is affectionately labeled Nana. Nana greeted us as we entered the house with her thick southwestern accent. Ruth’s dad, Papa, came out to say hello then retreated to his office to continue his spider solitaire game on the computer. Soon after cousins and sisters and other family members arrived at the house and the noise level quickly rose to an uproar. Riley spent his time with his cousin’s playing with electric circuit sets and learning obscene songs that only six year-olds have the audacity to perform for their grandparents. Casey and I were content to read pop-up books and play with puzzles while everybody else went about their normal family behavior. A casual observer might have thought that everybody was upset and constantly yelling at each other but the weekend progressed without the slightest decrease in volume so I concluded that this was just the voice this family used to speak to each other.

For months now Riley had been very interested in two things often synonymous with each other: guns, and church. These are probably the two main subjects the Hackford-Peer household just does not associate with. Other than Ruth though, the entire Hackford family members are avid hunters. When Riley was given the option of going out shooting with Papa on Sunday morning or going to the Mormon Church with his cousins he chose the latter. Since I had never been to a Mormon service before I decided to join them as well. First, we sat through the hour long Sacrament in which the High Council spoke of topics so irrelevant I was lost before they even started speaking and then we all partook of some bread and water. At least in the Catholic church we get alcohol. After the Sacrament was a scripture class in which we were taught from the book of Mormon. Following the class, the men and women separated to discuss other aspects of the religion. After three hours of Church we finally headed back home. When asked what he thought about church Riley said that he loved it. I’m sure I would have too if I got to sing fun songs and eat cupcakes. We packed up the car and Ruth, Riley, Casey and I made our way back to SLC.

That next week I began volunteering at Riley’s school. Riley is in a duel-immersion school in which half the students are native Spanish speakers. Right now Riley spends about 25 percent of his time in a Spanish speaking classroom and the other 75 percent with other English speaking students. After my wanderings through Spain I decided I wanted to learn Spanish so I started volunteering in the Spanish speaking Kindergarten class. The children are amazing and I love when they call me Señor Will. I began reading books to the children who don’t get read to very often and though my vocabulary leaves something to be desired I am able to read books that I know well enough in English to pick up the other words in Spanish. I read books like La Pequeña Locamotora que si Pudo (The Little Engine that could) and Si Le Das Una Galletita a un Raton (If You Give a Mouse a Cookie). My Spanish has improved significantly and I am grateful for this practice.

A friend of mine from college in Alamosa had moved out here to the Salt Lake area almost a year ago to be near the Hackford-Peer family as well. Vee offered to take me snowboarding if I would teach her some things. She had only been twice before and was hoping to get some pointers. We went up to the mountains, strapped on our gear and headed up the lift. As so often happens with beginner snowboarders she fell immediately after dismounting from the chairlift. She got up, strapped in, and we took off down the mountain. The first run took approximately half and hour but by the end of the day she was getting down the run in about ten minutes. We took a little break during the middle of the day and I was able to go off on my own exploring Utah’s self-proclaimed “Greatest Snow on Earth”. I have to say that although I have been in situations that have had better conditions, the Utah snow did impress me. I had a blast flowing through the powder among great tree runs. By the end of the day, I’ll say I was very satisfied.

With spring around the corner the weather off and on became better and better. On one particularly nice Sunday afternoon Vee, the family and I went to the Hogle Zoo. Casey, being particularly interested in elephants, wanted to see the pachyderms first so we headed that way. As soon as we arrived at the elephant enclosure the elephant closest to us let loose a giant load. Riley saw it and yelled out “Mama! That elephant just took a huge shit!” Suppressing a laugh Ruth turned to him and said, “We are in a public place; use the word ‘poop’.” After that we saw the usual suspects, lions, tigers, bears; Dorothy would have been proud. At the end of the day we took a ride on the train that wound around the play park through the buffalo pen and past the bald eagles. By then we were zoo’d out.

I kept going to the Tibetan monastery and even took Vee with me once. It was apparent though that this wasn’t really doing anything for me. Perhaps it was the weird chanting or the extreme ritualism but it just wasn’t my thing. I talked a bit with the Lama’s wife who recommended I check out the Zen center here in town. Vee and I decided to check it out together. The trip to the Zen center would have to wait though as we had other adventures forthcoming. The following weekend we all went to the beautiful city of Moab.

With its red painted cliffs and desert scenery Moab is a city photographers love to capture. Yet even photographs do not do the area justice. Moab is surrounded by a couple of National parks including Canyonlands and Arches. We decided to do some hiking through Arches National Monument. With Riley clambering over rocks and Casey in tow we made the 1.5 mile hike up to Delicate Arch, the signature landmark of the park. Snowcapped peaks in the background provided a striking contrast to the crimson colored rock that made the hike especially beautiful. After seeing a few more arches it was time to head back to the rented condo. That evening some other friends from Alamosa, Teri and Tim, managed to join us in Moab. Beer and wine flowed all evening while tequila shots were consumed. Needless to say, the night quickly became a blur. Awaking the next morning to a horrible hangover we ate breakfast and packed up our things. Vee and I decided to take another little hike through Arches before getting out of Moab. We walked up a trail to see beautiful formations including the landscape arch and wall arch. On our way back down to the car we were hit by a cold front which started dropping snow the minute we entered the parking lot.

Once we got to the car we had to hurry so I could catch a bus out of Green River, Utah. My parents were on their way to Las Vegas because my dad had a conference there and I decided to join them. We arrived in Green River just minutes before the bus showed up but I was able to hop on. The bus rolled along through the hills of southern Utah in inclement weather with no real problems. After six hours we arrived in Las Vegas and my parents showed up at the bus station to pick me up. It had only been about two and half months since I saw them last but it was wonderful to see them again. While dad spent his days in meetings mom and I sunbathed by the pool or went on adventures. The first day we were there mom and I went in search of a wooden flute, the kind used in Native American music. We found one that was perfect for me and we bought it. I started playing and discovered just how easy it was to play.

The following day mom and I went to check out the Hoover Dam. We came within two miles of it to find that traffic had slowed to a crawl. When we finally arrived at the dam there were so many people we just decided to continue on. A few miles later we saw a sign that pointed to a road saying there was a beach in that direction. We thought we’d check it out. After driving another couple miles down a steep and curvy road we found ourselves at the foot of Mohave Lake, a 27 mile long lake with canyon walls running up either side. We disembarked and started walking along the water’s edge. After climbing over an outcropping we reached a secluded beach. We sat down and listened to the water lapping against the small rocks on the shore. I pulled out my flute and began to play. Melodic notes echoed through the canyon bouncing off the wall and skimming the water. The echo provided the harmony to the melody I played. Several minutes later I stopped and was absorbed in silence. All of a sudden, within feet of the shoreline, a loon popped to the surface of the water. To see this beautiful waterfowl in a desert environment during the middle of the day is so unlikely that I would have thought it impossible had I not seen it with my own eyes and had someone there to confirm the sighting.

This was an incredible experience for both my mother and I as it related us to our summers spent in Canada upon the lakes of Muskoka. At dawn or dusk one could often hear the call of the loon and would be moved by the eerie yet beautiful sound. Then we would see the loons pop up in the middle of the lake for a few seconds before diving back under the glassy surface for minutes at a time. As I said, to see a loon at a lake in the middle of the desert during the middle of the day was quite and extraordinary experience. It remained on the surface just long enough to get a good look at us before it disappeared again beneath the water. Returning to our room at the Flamingo hotel we were ecstatic and couldn’t wait to tell my dad about it. While in Vegas we were able to catch a few shows including Monty Python’s Spamalot and the Cirque de Soleil: Ka. After a week spent with my parents it was time to head back to Salt Lake.

I hung out with Vee that weekend and we did some hiking in the area. Easter Sunday we decided to check out the Zen Center. We arrived and did a half hour of meditating before listening to a talk given by one of the Senseis. The talk was very profound and enlightening about the nature of Karma. The Sensei mentioned that many people see Karma as a reward and punishment system yet the true nature of it is more in tune with the laws of physics. For every action there is a reaction. Simply put, Karma is physics, a common law throughout the universe, nothing more. Although what he talked about was something I already believed I felt intrigued by his speech. I decided to return to the Zen center the following Wednesday for Zazen, or sitting meditation. I found that this was much more in tune with what I was looking for than anything else I had previously found. I have since been attending the Sunday morning workshops and Wednesday Zazen and feel confident that this is where I am supposed to be right now.

The week after I returned from Vegas was Riley’s Spring Break. Although the weather was not wonderful there were a few days that we were able to get outside and do some things. One of the outdoor activities Riley and I undertook was learning how to ride a bike. That is, I was helping him learn. For a couple days we took his little purple bike to the elementary school parking lot. He put on all his gear including knee and elbow pads, a helmet, and a biker jacket. Once prepared he got on the bike and raced off. After several attempts at finding balance and falling over he finally started to get the hang of it. After three days of riding he was already riding without assistance all around the school. He still has trouble taking off and landing, as he says, but he is so close to being independent. Before starting out he and I made a bet. I bet that Casey would be potty-trained before he could completely ride on his own. Right now Riley is so close and Casey has no interest what so ever in pooping on the toilet. It looks like I may have lost this bet. I will be spending a whole day playing whatever games Riley wants to play. I guess it could be worse.

The Hackford-Peers have truly become my family and I love them dearly. Life here has become as normal as life can be and I feel grateful to be who I am in this place. I am surrounded by people who really care about me and offer so much support. I know that I am influencing their lives as positively as they are mine and that wherever I go in this life I will always have another family to come home to.

Mormons and Whales and Lesbian Tales

2008-01-25T14:38:00.000-07:00

Colorado brought many changes to me. Determining how to integrate all that I had discovered in my travels into the life of a commercial and consumer culture was quite difficult. My life in Colorado was completely different from the life I lived traveling with all my belongings strapped to my back. I noticed how excessive this culture is. We equate waste with privilege. America believes that we have the ability to buy cheap products then discard them so we must be a rich society. We are anything but. Coming back to this was very challenging for me mentally, spiritually, and physically. Not even a week after returning my skin and eyes took on a yellow hue. It was clear that my liver was having problems and that I was jaundiced. My mother and I visited a naturopathic doctor who took blood samples to be tested and advised me on how to care for my body in the state it was in. The results of the blood test came back within a couple days. The ND diagnosed me with Hepatitis B. She made a tincture of milk thistle and gave me several other remedies to take until the situation had improved. Because the remedies tasted horrible I knew they had to be working.

A couple weeks later I went with my mom and dad to Pensacola, Florida to visit my grandmother and soak up some sun. While there we walked along the deserted, white sandy beach, we celebrated my grandmother’s birthday, and my mom and I took a day trip to New Orleans. While in New Orleans we enjoyed the balmy November weather of 80 degrees. We walked around the city listening to street musicians play the blues. We ate bengets covered in powdered sugar in the French Quarter. I even had my palm read by a street palm reader who told me I was a very old soul and would have a long life. Back in Colorado I spent most of my days with my mom hiking in the mountains or chilling at the house. In the evenings my dad, mom, and I would relax with movies, cards, books, or whatever else we wanted. The Florida sun, family time, and herbal medications improved my physical condition tremendously. Within weeks my skin and eyes had returned to their normal color and I felt better than ever. During the next couple weeks I spent a lot of time with my parents and also some great friends I’ve had since high school.

In mid December my sister Christina came home from college. She, my parents and I were taking a trip to Maui in the Hawaiian Islands. We took off from Denver with snow littering the tarmac and landed on the lima bean shaped island in the tropics. With the sun shining and wind blowing we hopped in the rented convertible and made our way to the condo. We stayed in an apartment overlooking the waves of the ocean calming lapping the shore. Palm trees abounded and tropical birds flew all around us. We spent most of our days bathing in the sun on the beautiful beaches and snorkeling in the warm clear water of the Pacific Ocean. We swam amidst millions of brightly colored fish, eels, and sea turtles. This time of year was mating season for the Humpback whales. Hundreds of whales gather in the warm waters surrounding Maui to challenge for mates and to spawn. These massive creatures were abundant while we were there so we saw several of them. They would breach only a hundred feet away and yet it seemed as though we could just reach out and touch them. Looking out over the water from the boat I would suddenly see a great plume of water jetting into the air. Following that the hump would emerge that gave these giant mammals their name, and then the tail would pop out of the water and dive again. What impressive animals these are. Just watching how graceful a 40 ton animal can be in the water is inspiring.

While in Maui we took a couple of day trips. One of these days we drove the infamous Road to Hana. With steep downgrades and sharp curves the thirty mile drive takes about two hours. Along the way we passed through massive rain forests and saw incredible water falls. We stopped at the Garden of Eden arboretum and walked among beautiful flower gardens and lush vegetation. I found several spiders that captivated me as I had never seen creatures that looked so alien yet so familiar. I filled my camera with pictures of these amazing spiders and spent much of my time observing them in their silken homes. Near the end of the Road to Hana there is an area known as O’heo Gulch or the Seven Sacred Pools. Here we stopped and found a hiking trail that led up through the forest. We hiked this trail passing fast flowing waterfalls and trees larger around than I had ever imagined. Part of the journey led us through an intense bamboo forest. For about ¾ of a mile we hiked in the shade of these tall trees as we listened to the clacking of the bamboo being knocked together by the wind. Upon finally arriving at the end of the trail we were met by one of the tallest waterfalls in the world. Waimoku Falls drops 400 feet down a sheer lava rock cliff to land gently in a pool of water below. Bathing in the spray at the bottom was refreshing after the long hike up. Hiking down took considerably less time as we were going downhill and had already seen the sights on the way up.

Another of our day trips began in the early morning hours as we drove to the top of the Maui crater. Extremely cold weather greeted us when we arrived as the sun was rising over the horizon. Clouds shifted on and around the mountain top highlighting the crest of the crater. Inside the crater the earth was bare and resembled a Martian landscape. Red and brown rocks crumbled and littered the terrain while small ice crystals formed between the cracks beneath our feet. From the top of the crater we could see the entire island from the sugar plantations to the Iao Valley.

We celebrated my parents’ 27th wedding anniversary there on the island by taking a sunset cocktail cruise. Since it was a cocktail cruise the alcohol was flowing freely and we all quenched our thirst. The rocking of the boat did not help our standing situation so we finally found that it was much easier to sit and hold on than attempt getting up for another drink. This was probably a good thing as when we exited the boat we still had a difficult time walking straight. When we arrived back on shore we made our way to the nearby miniature golf and family adventure park. Rather than putting we spent most of the time throwing the golf balls at the holes or retrieving them from the water traps. The next day with slight hangovers we made our way to the airport to return home. Leaving the beautiful tropical weather of Maui behind us we returned to a cold and snow-packed Colorado.

A couple days later, on Christmas Eve, my brother Peter flew in from San Francisco. That evening my mom and I sang in the choir at the Catholic Church my family has been a part of for years. We followed our yearly tradition of attending midnight mass then returned home to sleep the night away. Christmas day we woke up to fresh snow on the ground and fewer presents under the tree than we had ever experienced before. This year was a very simple Christmas for our family involving a trip to Maui rather than material gifts and I think we all preferred it this way; at least I know that I did. The holiday season was truly joyous and a celebration of family. The focus was on relationships and spirituality rather than on physical gifts being exchanged. It was the best Christmas I had ever had. A few days later Peter left us to return to his home in California. Following that I organized a New Year’s Eve party at my house. I invited all my high school friends as well as all their parents. It was a fascinating combination of the two generations coming together for the first time in several years. The party celebrated the dawn of a new year with many hopes, dreams, and anticipations of the year to come.

Not quite a week later I said goodbye to my parents and left with Christina on our way to her house in Gunnison, Colorado. I spent the next two weeks with her in the coldest region of the continental United States. While there we experienced temperatures of forty degrees below zero and six feet of snow. Many days were spent snowboarding on the mountain of Crested Butte while other days I played with Christina’s dog Tyson along the snowy banks of the frozen Tomichi River. I had a blast hanging out with my sister and her friends. While I was there we celebrated Christina’s 21st birthday in true college 21st birthday style. Needless to say much passing out and throwing up was involved. Two days after her birthday Christina and her boyfriend Jordon drove me out to Grand Junction in Western Colorado. There I met some friends of mine from college who picked me up and drove me to their home in Salt Lake City, Utah.

I have been living with my friends, Kim and Ruth, for nearly a week now and definately want to stay a lot longer. I met them while attending college in Alamosa, Colorado. As a lesbian couple they were quite the oddity in the small town and the fact that they had a one year-old son added to that oddity. We became fast friends. I have always adored children and when asked to baby-sit the one year-old Riley I jumped at the opportunity. Before my senior year of college they moved away to Salt Lake. We stayed in touch and during my road trips to and from Mammoth Lakes, California I would stop in and visit. Riley grew bigger and bigger every time I saw him. He is now six years-old and the moment he saw me he gave me a huge hug; he has yet to let go. He calls me his “brudda” which is Riley-talk for brother as he has yet to master his “r” sounds. He, along with his nearly two year-old brother Casey and his two mommies have become my new family. I am so grateful to be here with them and look forward to all the adventures we will have together. Until next time, adios from Mormon land!

Boa Onda

2007-10-25T14:17:00.000-06:00

After a few days of relaxation in Altura I decided it was time to head off to new adventures. I was very grateful for the hospitality shown me by Madelena and her daughter and I hope I expressed that gratitude while in their company. I used the money left over from the past couple days to buy a couple bus tickets to Largos on the South Atlantic tip of Portugal. When the bus arrived I began walking out of town to reach the highway. I turned down a dirt road and walked until the sun set. When the sky darkened I stopped at a run down barn which was apparently still functional as that night my neighbor was a giant pig in the pen next to where I slept. When I woke up the next morning I packed my things and proceeded to the highway. I was picked up shortly after I started hitchhiking and asked the driver where I could find a cool beach surrounded by cliffs. He took me to a huge surfing beach where giant cliffs rose out of the ocean on either side of me. Relaxing there for a little while I was hoping to find some people to hang out with. After being around people who spoke little to no English over the past couple weeks I was starting to feel the desire for company. I pulled out my guitar and started playing hoping that someone would arrive and relieve me my loneliness. After a couple hours I realized I wouldn’t find what I was looking for there so I packed up and moved on. A couple rides later I was picked up by two young guys both of whom spoke English. They were part of a small punk-rock band and were heading to a jam session. They invited me to join them and I immediately took them up on the offer. While waiting for the drummer to show up I pulled out my guitar (whom I named Jana ;) and they each proceeded to take her for a little “test drive”. The three guys were all very good guitarists. They taught me a couple of chords and gave me some good tips on guitar playing. The drummer finally arrived and after we smoked a couple joints they started jamming. Being the talented musicians they are they played several songs, all very entertaining as I sat back and listened. When they finished we all went out for drinks. They took me to a bar down by the ocean where we drank, and drank, and drank some more. By the time the bar closed we were pretty smashed. No one was able to put me up for the night so I wandered down the street in a drunken stupor and passed out on a dirt road.

Waking up the next morning with a headache I made my way to the road where I could hitch a ride. Hitching with a hangover is difficult enough, standing in the hot Portuguese sun as trucks fly by, but once I came close to Lisbon there were no more small roads to hitch on, only the freeway. In Portugal, as with most countries in Europe, it is illegal to hitchhike on the freeway thus people are very unlikely to pick a hitchhiker up. After waiting at the freeway entrance unsuccessfully I started walking up onto the highway. I figured I could at least make it to a service station or something where I might have some luck. After walking along the highway for a bit I was greeted by a large road sign that told me the next service station was 20 kilometers ahead. Disparaged I could do nothing but continue walking. A couple kilometers down the road I saw a small delivery truck pulled over on the side of the road with his emergency lights flashing. I ran to it. Upon arrival at the truck I looked in the window to see a guy on his cell phone. I tapped on the window and he looked at me with a most quizzical look. Although he didn’t speak any English and I didn’t speak Portuguese I managed to get across that I was in need of a lift to the next service station or something. I jumped in the cab and we had a very limited conversation. I asked where he was going and it turned out he was heading near Sintra, a place I was recommended to check out by one of the guys the night before, so I asked if he could take me there. After a long ride in the quiet cab we arrived in Sintra. After saying goodbye I proceeded up the hill to the city. By this time it was well after the sun had set and I was just looking for a place to sleep. Walking up a large hill I saw a guy leaning out of his ground floor window smoking a joint. I walked up to him and asked if he spoke English. After telling him I was looking for a place to sleep he asked me how much I wanted to spend, I replied, “zero”. He thought for a second then told me to meet him in the front of his house. He came out of his house and after introducing himself as Bruno we got into his car. We drove up a large hill way back in the forest and he led me to an abandoned house. Apparently this house had been built a few years ago by a drug dealer on this preserved land. Now the dealer was in jail and his house was often used for parties on the weekends. There was no one there this night so it was a good place to stay. Since it was on top of a large hill it had a beautiful view of Lisbon and the surrounding waters. I slept soundly amongst the broken glass and profane graffiti tagged on the walls. I awoke the next morning to a beautiful sunrise above Lisbon. I walked around that day enjoying the beauty that is Sintra. As the shadows lengthened and the day grew darker it also got colder. I didn’t have many warm clothes as I wasn’t anticipating being in cold weather anytime soon. I put on all the clothes I had and tried to keep warm under a small structure. I then went up to Bruno’s house again to see if he was home. I waited about half an hour for him to return and he found me huddled beneath a street lamp using my sleeping bag to keep warm. He invited me into his car and had me wait there for a half hour while he went to eat dinner with his family. He came out half an hour later with a bag containing hot soup, a roast beef sandwich, juice and sweet bread. He also had another bag with food for breakfast. He drove me back up the hill to the abandoned house where we smoked a joint before he left. Another night in the creepy house followed.

I arose the next morning ready to move on. I got a ride straight away off the road with a professional Judo martial artist. After dropping me off I was shortly picked up by a 24 year-old named Antonio. He invited me to come hang out with him and his girlfriend. Since they lived with their respective parents they would spend their Saturdays chilling at the back of a grocery store. Antonio took me to the store and left me there. He only had a two-seater car so he left to pick up Miriam, his girlfriend. They arrived a few minutes later and he parked the car at the edge of the deserted parking lot. We spent several hours together drinking beer, smoking joints, playing music, and talking about everything. They taught me some really cool Portuguese phrases such as “foda-se”, “paz e amor”, “tenho saudades da minha familia”, and my personal favorite “boa onda” which means “good wave”. Boa onda is the feeling you have when everything is just as it should be. About halfway through the day the clouds broke open and started pouring down rain. We moved under the shopping cart return cover of the parking lot where we continued our conversations. Antonio pulled out a huge binder full of guitar tablatures and told me to take whichever ones I wanted. I went through and picked out songs I knew that I would be able to play. Miriam, Antonio and I spent another few hours under the meager protection of the shopping cart cover until it was time to continue on. I said goodbye to Miriam and hoped in Antonio’s car with him. He first took me to the grocery store where he bought me whatever groceries I wanted. Then we drove down the highway a few kilometers where he dropped me off at a nice service station. We said goodbye and he drove off.

The service station had a kitchen and everything and seeing me come in with all my things out of the rain one of the attendants gave me a nice hot bowl of soup. As I sat slurping up my soup a man came over asking if I wanted a ride up the road. He was only going a few kilometers but he could at least take me to the next service station. I agreed to go with him and after finishing the soup hopped in his really nice Mercedes. The 60 kilometers we traveled took only about 10 minutes at the speed he traveled. He dropped me off and I headed inside. A furious game of football (or soccer if you prefer) was underway on the tv and the station attendants were caught up in watching it. I set down my things and joined them in enjoying the game. When the game finished one of the attendants told me I could pull out my guitar and start playing if I wanted, so I did. He mentioned he played a little guitar himself so he picked up Jana and started playing a bit. He taught me a couple things such as the intro to Pink Floyd’s “Wish You Were Here”. Then he and the other people left leaving only me and the night attendant. I pulled out my sleeping bag in the corner of the station and managed to catch a couple hours sleep. I woke up and hung out with the other attendant playing guitar and teaching him some English. After a little while he handed me a paper bag full of sandwiches and drinks. He also gave me a nice blanket and scarf. By this time my bag was about ten times heavier than it had been in the last month from all the food I was carrying. When morning arrived and people began filing into the station I packed up my things and set up a note indicating the direction I was going and asking for a ride. I sat there for hours reading and playing Jana. At one point a woman walked up to me and handed me three euros thanking me for the music. Eventually the same attendant who taught me some guitar said he was leaving for the day and could take me to the beach town of Nazré so I decided to go with him there. I spent the rest of the afternoon on the beautiful beach watching the waves crash against the cliff faces and seeing children play in the sand and sea. I played more music while sitting on a bench. A young boy walked by with a little toy guitar and his mother. He was fascinated by my guitar playing, as simplistic as it was. He pulled on his mom’s sleeve and she gave him some change. He walked over and handed me a euro and a half. After playing for a little while I made my way to an alley where I prepared a wonderful meal from all the food I had. While eating a guy came up to me and started speaking in French. He invited me to the bar right next to where I was eating for a couple glasses of Portuguese wine. After that I walked back down to the beach where I set up camp for the night.

After awaking I made my way up the hill to where I could continue hitchhiking. I was picked up minutes after I stuck my thumb out and within two rides made it all the way to Coimbra, a nice city with the oldest university in Europe. As it was a descent sized city I decided to catch a bus out in order to begin hitching again. I went to the station and bought a ticket for as far as I could go on the four euros I had. A thirty minute bus ride later left me on the side of the road in a small town. I tried hitchhiking for a couple hours until the sun began to set. Just as I was about to stop for the night and find a place to sleep a car pulled over. In the driver’s seat was a middle aged woman and in the back seat was her two daughters, one 13 and one 3. The woman, Margarida, spoke English and French and so we were able to communicate fairly well. I asked her if there was a nice park or some other place I could sleep in the town they were heading to. She said she didn’t know of any but that she had plenty of room in her house and I was welcome to stay with them. We arrived at her place and she made dinner as I took a bath. After eating we said goodnight and I slept in an incredibly comfortable bed beneath the skylight. In the morning I ate breakfast with Salome, the three year-old, on the porch as we watched Safira, the other daughter, walk off to school. That day as the girls were in school and Margarida was working I relaxed in and around the house. When they returned we went out to a nice restaurant where we ate Portuguese food including an appetizer of pig’s ear. The following day Margarida took Salome and me to the local market where she bought me a couple pairs of really comfortable socks. That evening I played guitar and taught Safira a little bit about playing as well. The four of us had a great evening together and I really felt like I was part of the family. The next day Margarida and I took Salome to school and then she took me to Visseu. Visseu is a beautiful old city, most of it built on huge granite rocks. After touring the city we proceeded another 200 kilometers east to the border between Portugal and Spain. Margarida and I ate lunch then she bought me a nice fleece jacket. I couldn’t thank this woman enough for all she had done for me. All I could do was try to express my gratitude in the most heartfelt way possible. She then looked me in the eye and sincerely said “Thank you for everything you have done also.”

I left Margarida and walked across the border into Spain. I was stopped there by border police who checked my bag and passport to make sure I wasn’t an illegal American immigrant smuggling pounds of hash from Morocco. After sending me on my way I set up at the edge of the highway to catch a ride. About an hour after I started a man pulled over and took me about 150 kilometers to Salamanca. I spent a few hours on the outskirts of the city trying to catch a ride but was unsuccessful. Darkness fell upon me and I went in search of a place to sleep. I found a plot of grass in between a couple apartment buildings where I brought out my bag and fell asleep. The night was very cold and upon waking the next morning I found my sleeping bag wet from the dew that gathered on the grass. As the sun rose so did I, setting my things out in the sunshine to dry them off as I put on every piece of clothing I had to keep warm. Once the day did finally start to heat up I set out in search of another freeway entrance. I found one and sat for a few hours trying to catch a ride. With nothing forthcoming I headed into the city. Walking around a bit I found the bus station and decided to check on a bus to France though I had no money. The only bus to France was going non-stop to Paris that afternoon and cost 95 euros. So it was either raise 95 euros by six o’clock that evening or try my hand at hitchhiking again. Naturally I tried to raise the money. I went to Western Unions and travel agencies seeing if I could send myself the money or use my mom’s credit card number to book the ride. Nothing worked. So I sat down on a bench and played with Jana for awhile. I then realized I was on the road which led to another freeway entrance. I started walking. Past car dealerships and shipping warehouses I finally made it to the highway. I set my things down and stuck out my thumb. About a half hour later a guy in a van picked me up and drove me to a service station about 200 kilometers down the road. There I made myself dinner and made a half-attempt to hitchhike more. I figured I could spend the night there at the station and at least be warm and dry but if someone picked me up to take me further down the road I’d be happy also. Just as the sun was setting I decided to stop for the evening but just before I put my thumb down a couple pulled over in a car. I hopped in and they took me about 15 kilometers down the road. They pointed me in the direction where I’d be able to catch a ride with some truck drivers so I walked that way. I found myself at a freeway entrance with no place for anyone to pull over and cars passing way too quickly to even consider picking up a hitchhiker. The sunlight faded quickly and I found myself beneath a streetlamp in the cold night. I realized that no one would pick me up there, at least not tonight so I set off to find another place to spend the night. Being surrounded by fields and very few buildings this was not an ideal place to spend a cold night. I walked behind a large feed store and found a place to sleep in the large field behind it. As the night wore on it grew colder and colder. I had layers of clothes on within my sleeping bag and still felt chilled to the bone. A restless night followed and as the sky became lighter I found myself under the dark grey skies with a sleeping bag soaked through by the moisture in the air. My back pack and I were also soaked. With no direct sunlight and cold, wet air there was no chance for my things to dry so I packed everything up still wet and headed back to the freeway entrance. That early in the morning there was very little traffic and fortunately I was picked up by a couple and their three year old son. I really didn’t care where they were headed as long as I could get a ride away from that spot. They took me way out into the country and dropped me off at another freeway entrance outside of the town where they were stopping. I set down my bag and waited. At this entrance I waited about eight hours hoping for a ride seeing one car pass me every hour. Eventually I gave up waiting and picked up my things. I began walking along the highway just trying to get to a place with more traffic. I then realized just how out in the country I was for I walked a half hour without seeing coming across an exit. I kept walking and at one point I arbitrarily stuck out my thumb. I saw a car screech to a halt in front of me and start reversing along the freeway in my direction. These three Hungarian guys were headed to Burgos and offered me a lift.

Upon arrival in the city I just prayed for a warm dry place to sleep that night. I walked and walked through the large city in the direction of the highway praying with every step. When night fell it was apparent that no one was going to invite me in to sleep in a house. When I grew too tired to walk anymore I found a tree next to the road and pulled out my bag. It was still wet from the night before but I couldn’t do anything about that so I set it up beneath the overhanging limbs of the tree anyway. I continued to pray that I would be warm and dry that night despite the situation I was in. I squeezed my way into the bag and found that as soon as I got in it the bag became dry. I lay down and was soon so warm I had to remove layers of clothing. Though my sleep was erratic due to passing cars and people I didn’t manage to sleep a bit. When I awoke I found dew covering the leaves of the tree above me and the grass around me. The fog was so thick it was difficult to see something ten yards away. Despite all the moisture surrounding me I touched my sleeping bag to find it completely dry. My backpack was completely dry. I was completely dry and although I could feel the chill in the air I was extremely warm. My prayer from the previous evening had been answered although not as I had expected it to be. I felt this was truly a miraculous experience and had a great feeling about the day ahead.

I continued walking along the road until I made it to a good hitchhiking spot. I stuck out my thumb and was picked up minutes later by two Belgian brothers, one looking like Michael Moore and the other like Wallace Shawn (the “inconceivable” guy from Princess Bride). They took me all the way across the border into France and dropped me off. I was shortly thereafter picked up by a really nice French guy. He asked if I had eaten yet and invited me to his house for lunch and a shower. At his place as he prepared a fantastic lunch of duck and potatoes I showered. After the shower and food I felt so much better. After playing a few songs for the man on my guitar we packed up and he drove me another 70 kilometers down the road. Right after he dropped me off I received another ride followed by another. Then I was picked up by an older couple who drove me well past Bordeaux. As night fell they asked where I was going to spend the night. When I told them I had no idea they invited me to stay at their house. They took me to their home in Saintes where they few me a great dinner and set me up on their couch. I slept very well as rain splattered against the window pane. I felt so blessed to be sleeping comfortably inside that night. When morning came they fed me breakfast and took me down the road to another highway. I was soon picked up by a guy who took me further down the road and dropped me off. As I was walking along searching for another place to hitchhike I noticed a designated hitchhiking spot marked by a sign. I stood there for a few minutes with my thumb out when a young woman pulled over and asked me where I was headed. I told her I was going to Paris and she said she was also. A few hours later we arrived in the city of lights. After hopping the metro gates I made my way into the city. I showed up at my old apartment where my friend Devon was living after taking my old job. Needless to say, he and his girlfriend Sara were quite surprised to see me as I hadn’t told anyone I would be in Paris. I surprised quite a few people during my weeklong stay in the French capital. I was in Paris because I had a flight leaving from Paris to the United States. After spending a week with Devon, Sara, Etienne, and other friends I illegally hopped on the train for the airport. Spending eight hours cooped up in an airplane from Paris to Washington DC was quite difficult, especially after having lived outdoors for the last three months. I finally arrived in DC and was met at the airport by my parents. My dad knew I was coming but my mom had no idea. When she saw me her jaw dropped and she was speechless. She had no idea when she would ever see me again so when I showed up in front of her she believed me to be a hallucination. I spent a few days with them in the nation’s capital and was able to see my aunt and my good friend Janet before we got on another plane to Colorado.

We arrived in Colorado just ahead of a large snow storm. That night I slept in my own bed at my Colorado home, the one place that has always felt like home to me. This was the best night’s sleep I had received in the last year or so. I woke up the next morning to snow blowing against my window. The trees and ground were covered with the white purity of the icy precipitation. I couldn’t have imagined a better homecoming.

Although I am not traveling at the moment and have no idea how long I’ll be here in Colorado this is not my last entry. I have the itch to continue traveling but for now am content to stay here with my family in an environment full of love and support. Until next time, peace!

Star Peace Episode VI: Return of the Hippie

2007-09-23T12:43:00.000-06:00

The past few days have been terribly difficult and extremely rewarding at the same time. Last night I was walking by a church in this small town in southern Portugal when the church bells chimed that mass was about to begin. I was extremely tired and pretty hungry but decided to attend mass anyway. It had been awhile since I had been to church and I thought the spiritual sustenance would be beneficial. I walked in and the usher offered to watch my bag and guitar at the back while I attended the service. I sat down and immediately started to pray. Mass started and with the first sign of the cross I became emotional nearly breaking out in tears right there and then. Though the mass was in Portuguese I participated to the best of my ability. When I couldn't understand what was being said I prayed. Mass ended and the people filed out. I was one of the few left within the church when a woman walked up to me with her daughter and told me how much I resembled Jesus and that it was nice to see Jesus attending church (at least I think that's what she said). All I could do was smile and nod and she walked away. After leaving the pew I knelt to genuflect and just lost it. Kneeling in the middle of the church I began bawling and praying that I would have reprieve this night from mosquitoes, torrential beach wind, and prying eyes. After a few minutes of open crying I stood up, wiped the tears from my face, and started towards the door. The usher was standing there talking with the woman who told me I looked like Jesus. She had placed a card on my bag of St. Rapahel, the patron saint of travelers. I looked at her and smiled. In my best Spanish (which is pretty limited) I asked if it was possible to sleep there in the church. The usher, Madelena, told me that it was not. She then started speaking in Portuguese to the other woman. Madelena told me something that I didn't quite understand and proceeded to lock up the church. After locking up she turned to me and made the motion for me to follow her. She led me to a house and opened up the door. The place looked like a guest house for traveling families as it had three bedrooms, two bathrooms, a kitchen, dining room, and television area. She took me in and motioned for me to put down my things. She then proceeded to make up one of the beds for me and left. She returned minutes later with her daughter who spoke English. They invited me to stay here as long as I wanted. They brought me fresh towels and soap and took my clothes to be washed. The "Jesus" woman then came with bags of fresh groceries. I have not been able to stop thanking God for this amazing manifestation. After a wonderful lunch with Madelena and her daughter and a spectacular dinner of split pea soup and pizza I am now sitting in their office writing.

Thinking about the month that has passed since I last posted I am wondering how to put many of the experiences I've had in words. After my last post I ended up staying in Madrid for a week as I met up with some friends of mine whom I met at the Running of the Nudes in Pamplona. Javier, a wonderful Argentinian with whom I connected on a very deep level had given me his address in Madrid and Dingo and I just showed up at his place. When he returned home from work he was quite surprised to see me there but proceeded to make us a fabulous dinner. The next day Dingo left to continue his own journey but I stayed in Madrid. Dingo has been a fabulous traveling companion and we experienced a lot together. I am truly grateful to have had his company for such a large part of this journey. The next evening I stayed with Sophie, a woman from France, as Javi's then-boyfriend was coming back to stay with him and was quite jealous of mine and Javi's relationship. Sophie and I had a great time together practicing my french, cooking vegan food, watching animal activist movies, and sunbathing by the pool. Javi, Sophie, and I hung out with another cool guy named Mario named after the famous brothers. After a week of relaxing in Madrid and eating completely vegan food I was off on the road again.

I caught a few rides heading south to Grenada including a ride with a beekeeper from the Pyrenees on his way to Morocco. I bought some honey from him and went on my way. I soon made it into Grenada and walked around the city a bit. I sat down on a bench in a small park and started eating some bread with the honey. A man walking by stopped and looked at me. He then sat down and began speaking to me. Alcohol dripping off his breath he asked me, "Do you know what the difference is between humans and animals?" Without waiting for a reply he said "Curiosity, man is curious as to why things work out such as they do." He talked about many things as I listened. After a couple hours passed he showed me to a nice cheap hotel where I could stay the night. I said my farewell and checked in. The next morning making my way to the bus station I sat down on a bench to eat my morning meal of dried fruits and nuts. The same man walking by stopped and sat down with me again. When it was time to go to the station he took me to the best bus stop to get there. We wished each other the best and parted ways. Upon arrival at the station I hopped on a bus bound for Orjiva, the town located near the hippie community. On the bus I met a young guy from Germany with long blond dreds. Benjamin was heading out into the mountains to do some camping and I told him of Benficio. Thinking it sounded like a good idea he decided to join me. When we arrived in Orjiva someone pointed us in the direction of Hitchhiker Corner where the Beneficio inhabitants hitch up to the commune. We waited there maybe five minutes before a woman stopped and loaded us into her car. She took us up the hill and pointed us in the direction of Beneficio. We walked a ways before we ended up in a dirt car park full of campers and beat up cars. Not sure what to make of it we headed up a trail which led into the woods. We saw many tents set up to our right so we found a spot and set up ours among them. After dropping off our things we continued up the trail passing tee pees, houses made of many recycled materials, and marijuana plants.

Continuing up the trail we climbed higher and higher into the mountains. At the top of a hill we stopped and chatted for a bit before heading back down. We climbed down a ravine and ended up coming into the camp of a man named Roi (pron. Roy). Roi looks as though Gandhi would look if he had the head of Groucho Marx. Standing there completely naked he invited the both of us to join him for tea. We agreed and sat with him in the outdoor carpeted circle used as the center for Roi's home. We spoke for awhile on enlightened topics and life in Beneficio. We had heard about a meditation group meeting that evening so we told Roi we wanted to go attend that. He said, "Welcome, you are here". We stayed for the meditation session where we focused on opening our chakras then remained for dinner. After dinner we said thank you and made our way down to the main lodge which was a big outdoor circle with a fire pit in the center. Musical instruments were abundant including guitars, drums, flutes and others. People were gathered around singing, playing, smoking marijuana, and thoroughly enjoying themselves in the relaxed and open atmosphere. The full moon that night provided a lot of beautiful energy and people were very happy. Ben and I sat and smoked joining in on the fun. I stayed up all night meeting new people, having amazing conversations, playing music, dancing, and soaking up the incredible energy of the place. A couple hours before dawn Sam, a talented young guy from England with whom I had spent most of the night talking, said goodnight and headed to bed. I found myself alone in the center of the circle playing with the fading coals of the fire and with no desire to go to sleep.

As dawn approached I decided to hike up a hill to catch the sunrise. I started out barefoot as I had no desire to wear shoes at this point. I had nothing with me but the shorts around my hips, the shirt on my back, and the camera strapped around my shoulder. I began walking and didn't stop until I reached the top of a large hill. From there I caught the sun coming over the mountain across from me on the town above Beneficio. Now that the sun was up I looked around and soaked up the beauty of the community in the valley below. I turned and saw that the mountain continued upwards and felt the desire to continue on, so I did. As I walked I found the earth turning more and more brown, the plants becoming drier, and the day growing hotter. I passed ruined buildings and with them the last signs of civilization but I continued on. Sometimes the heat would become so intense on the rocks below my feet I risked life and limb to run across steep gradients just to find shade and reprieve for my feet but still I continued on. I would find a tree from time to time under whose branches I relaxed in the shade as much as the hot day would allow. I would meditate under these trees for what seemed like hours. When I was ready to bear the heat of the sun soaked rocks I continued on. As the sun began its descent so did I. I started walking down into the valley but my way was soon blocked by tangles of brush. Light was fading fast so I found a place to sleep amongst the bushes. That night I stayed awake again praying, meditating, and receiving the most amazing visions. That night I communicated with nature. I listened to the wind speak to me through the trees. The crickets chirped a sweet song for me and the moon shone between the bushes to enlighten me and my surroundings. Believe it or not I watched as several spiders gathered together to create a web right next to my head. I realized that this web was a natural dream catcher and that I was dreaming while fully awake. That night I experienced things that I never imagined possible. I saw gateways to other dimensions and I traveled them. I felt time itself. We see the effects of time's passage around us but before this I had never actually felt time. There is no way to describe in words what I actually experienced but suffice to say I found the divine light within which is exactly what I had been searching for. I have no idea how long that night lasted. It could have been minutes or hours, it all felt the same to me.

Dawn crept over the horizon and I crawled out of my shelter. I began my decent further down the mountain trying to get back to Beneficio. When I heard water I would try to find it as I knew there was a river running from the mountains straight down through the community. I would traverse steep rock faces holding on with only the tips of my fingers and toes. I would climb down to areas of green thinking there must be water nearby only to find my passage blocked by thick bramble choking off any passage. The day wore on with no food or water to be found but as unusual as it may seem I was neither hungry nor thirsty. I realized that I had everything I needed within me already and that if I only kept going I would find my way. The sun crossed the desert canyon and started to dip behind the western canyon wall above me. By the fading light I made my way into a copse of trees. As I tramped through the small forest the light became more and more dim. Soon I couldn't see where I was going so I felt my way around. I came to a point where the way ahead was blocked, both sides were closed around me and I could not see from where I had come. I decided to stop there for the night and continue at first light. This night was the coldest and darkest night I had experienced in this lifetime. I spent most of the night curled in a ball crying. I may have slept a little but there was no way to tell for sure. I prayed and cried until the sun came up. When I could see my surroundings I noticed a small passage ahead of me. Crawling through the dirt with thorny vines grabbing at my back I slowly made my way between the branches. I have no idea how long I was crawling through that mess but by the time it opened up and I could stand I felt as though I had never before stood upright. The sun was shining through the trees and I could hear running water, the most beautiful sound I had ever heard. I pushed past bushes not caring about the thorns and the blood they drew. I climbed up and over trees and saw below me a pool of water, orange in color and smelling of disease. Needless to say I did not drink. I came out of the woods and noticed above me powerlines I had passed on the first day. I decide that instead of attempting to continue down into oblivion I would climb back up the mountain following the powerlines and go back the way I had come. I climbed and climbed running from the shade of one tree to the shade of another that my blistering feet would have relief. I found the path I had taken the first day and followed it back. The late afternoon sun was beating down on me by the time I saw my first glimpse of humanity in three days. A woman in her late 50s was washing her dishes in a hommade sink. I walked over to the ledge above her and managed to croak out, "tiennes aqua?" She looked me up and down and said "Of course". She handed me a bottle and I drank the sweetest tasting water that had ever touched my lips. She said to me, "You look like Robinson Crusoe. Didn't I see you pass by here a few days ago? What on earth have you been doing?" I didn't say much but recounted my tale to Sula as best I could. She showed me a fig tree which I immidiately climbed and began eating fig after fig right there in the tree. After some time had passed I went back down the mountain to the main commune area. I thought I would try to find Benjamin as I was sure he would be worried about me. Sure enough I found notes posted all over Beneficio in his hand writing asking if anyone had seen me and that if I returned to contact him as soon as possible. He had taken my things up to Roi's place and had left that morning. I walked all the way up to Roi's and found him sitting there in his circle with a smile on his face as though he were expecting me, which I'm sure he was. We didn't say a word to each other, we didn't have to. He knew exactly what I went through as he was right there with me. He had no worries that I would return and tried to convey that to Benjamin while he was there. I sat down with Roi then colapsed completely.

The sun was past the canyon wall by the time I awoke. Roi was humming as he placed stone and clay for the house he was building. He looked at me and smiled. I returned the smile whole-heartedly. Roi then proceeded to make dinner for us but oddly enough I wasn't hungry. In fact my appetite didn't return until a few days later. For the next couple weeks I spent most of my time with Roi, meditating, cooking, hauling stones from the mountain, picking fresh figs, grapes, and almonds, tending the garden, and enjoying the nature that surrounded me. Roi gave me a traditional north african dress and said "This is how a servant of God should dress". I put it on and immidiatly fell in love with it. Since he gave it to me I haven't worn anything else. It just fits me. I met some other amazing people including our neighbor Randy. Randy was from New Jersey and was a huge Jimmy Hendrix fan. One night I helped him take a used bench seat down the hill for trash and we spent the evening sitting in the back of his van smoking ganja and listening to Hendrix tapes. Other interesting people included the homosexual biblical couple Simon and Paul, a crazy Italian named Jesus, the bundles of wood-toting Mohammed, and too many others to name.

After two and a half weeks in Beneficio I thought life was perfect and couldn't get any better. I was spending the day with Randy smoking and watching over his garden guarding against the heard goats that sometimes came down to eat his plants when a woman passed by on her way up the mountain trail. We invited her to come over and relax for a bit. Jana (pron. Yana) was from Prague and within her eyes I could see an entire universe. She and I shared a strong connection instantly. She stayed for dinner with us and that night she and I slept arm in arm within the circle at Roi's. We spent the next couple days together enjoying life around Beneficio. One day Jana's friend Alesh showed up as well as Roi's brother and his friend. We had a feast of many wonderful foods all prepared right there in Beneficio including some fresh sourdough bread Roi backed in his clay oven. Alesh and Jana were heading out the next day and I wasn't sure if I'd join them or not as I was enjoying Beneficio so much. I really felt at home there. In the morning Jana and Alesh gathered their things and started saying goodbye. I looked at Roi and he said to me, "don't leave anything unfinished." With that I knew I wanted to go with Jana. I packed my things quickly, gave Roi a huge hug, and ran down the hill after them. By the time we reached Orjiva we had missed the bus heading south so we decided to hitchhike. In my experience hitchhiking with two people is difficult, with three there was no way we were going to get a ride. Someone did pull over but said he could only take one and was heading to Grenada so Alesh left us and went with him. Jana and I then spent the day slowly making our way to the coast tropical of Spain. By early evening we arrived in Nerja and found our way to the beach. We set up camp amongst the rocks and spent a beautiful night together sharing love as I had never experienced before. The next day we relaxed on the beach singing and playing guitar. We swam in the surf and soaked up the rays of the sun. That afternoon we made our way further up the coast to Marbella and spent another night on the beach. The next morning Jana took a bus to Malaga where she was to catch a plane bound for Barcelona. There she would meet her boyfriend and they would hike the Pyrenees together before heading back to Prague.

After an emotional goodbye at the bus station I took off down the road. I managed to catch a few rides and ended up in Tarifa, the southern most point of Spain. Here I could catch a ferry over to Morrocco which would have been very cool. However, the ferry cost 30 euros which was about ten times what I had to my name so I stayed in Tarifa. I saw a guy sitting on a bench with a drum so I went over and started hanging out with him. That evening he showed me a place to sleep out of the driving coastal wind in an abandoned worksite. I didn't really sleep that night. I spent the night thinking of Jana, writing poetry, meditating, and doing yoga. In the morning I left and made my way west towards Portugal. The first ride I received took me to a really cool beach on the coast where we tanned in the nude and smoked just enjoying the beautiful day. When we were leaving a young blond british guy ran up to me and handed me a plastic bag with rice and tomato soup within. He said that they were heading home that evening and that he was going to just throw the stuff away so if I wanted it I was welcome. After my ride dropped me off in the andalucia region of Spain I was shortly picked up by three young beautiful Spanish women. When they dropped me off the one I had been sitting with in the back said, "You look like Jesus Christ". Continuing on my way I made it into the town of Jerez. I spent the night there and attempted to hitchhike in the morning. To give you an idea I spent the next three days hitchhiking and made it about 200 kilometers. This means I spent about ten hours each day on the side of the road walking with my thumb out in the blistering heat of the southern spanish sun and two hours in cars. A van pulled over and handed me a watermelon. So for these days I was surviving on rice and watermelon. The places I slept were laden with mosquitoes so it was very difficult to actually sleep. I finally arrrived at the border town on the Portuguese side of the border where I met a group of homeless guys sitting in the park. I hung out with them awhile and connected well with a guy named Paul who barely spoke English. That evening he took me to a homeless shelter where they gave us coffee and ham sandwhiches. I am not usually one to eat meat and I never drink coffee but the coffee was delicious and I ate about four sandwhiches. Paul then took me to his home underneath a ramp to the municiple swimming pool where he invited me to stay the night with him and his companion, a dog named El Niño. The next day he took me to a place where I had a nice shower then we returned to the shelter for a great meal of soup, rice, salad, and honeydew melon. After that I attempted to hitch further into Portugal. I walked down the street, set my things down and stuck my thumb out. Scant minutes passed when a woman walked up to me and gave me a bag full of fruit. She told me I reminded her of her 24 year old son. She said I would be hard pressed to get a ride there and gave me 20 euros for the bus and whatever else. She walked into her house right there and returned shortly with another bag full of food and a picture of her son. She then wished me a good journey and left me there. I hopped on the bus and headed up the coast a bit. I arrived in another beach town where I attempted to sleep on the beach but was agani bombarded by mosquitoes and coastal wind. The next morning instead of hitching I decided to walk along the beach to the next town. About halfway there I stopped to rest and met a lonely old German guy. I played my guitar for him and we hung out together for awhile. When I got up to leave he handed me ten euros and wished me a good journey. Shortly thereafter I arrived here in Altura where I met this amazing family. They have taken me in and treated me so well. I cannot believe the things I have been through on this journey and the experiences that I have had thus far. I am extremely blessed to be here and surrounded by love. I know this would be even more difficult without the support of family and friends so I wish to thank you all for your thoughts and prayers. From here I haven't decided which direction to go but I'm sure it will lead me to even more adventure. Until next time, até a vista!

Drug dealers and a new guitar

2007-08-20T03:30:00.000-06:00

Waking up to see the beautiful San Sebastian bay below me with the surrounding city behind it was one of the most beautiful sights I have seen in a long time. Unfortunately when you are awakened by rain at 6 in the morning you don’t have the opportunity to really appreciate it.

Budapest was an amazing city with its huge castle jutting out of a mountain and the Danube running down its center separating the Buda and Pest sides of the city. Dingo and I had a fantastic time staying with our friends there but decided to get out of the city for a bit and see the countryside. There was a PsyTrance festival going on down south so we went to check it out. Hitchhiking out of the city we were shortly picked up by a woman and her 11 year-old son. They were heading in our direction so we went with them for awhile. About an hour into the ride she invited us to come stay at her house with her and her two other children. Dingo and I looked at each other and said, “Why not?” so we went. We arrived at a small country house near Lake Balaton, the largest lake in Europe. The house was surrounded by wine vineyards and cornfields. We met the rest of the family including the grandfather who gave us homemade wine from his vineyard. Dingo and I cooked that night for the whole family by candlelight in the old pig shed. After dinner Dingo performed his fire show for the family who loved it. The following day we went to the lake with Julie, the 20 year-old daughter. We spent a few hours sunbathing and swimming in the beautiful body of water. In the evening we were invited to go to a friend’s house to hang out. We thought we’d meet a few people, maybe four or five, drink a few beers, and just chill. When we arrived we were greeted by about thirty-five to forty smiling faces. Apparently the family had told all their friends about Dingo’s fire show and they gathered to see it. Dingo did his performance to a wide round of applause then someone broke out a guitar and started playing while I sang. We entertained and were entertained all night long. As much fun as we were having we took off the next day to go back to Budapest. After singing along to the guitar player my flame for learning to play the guitar was rekindled. The day before my birthday, back in Budapest, I started searching for a guitar. Dingo and I went to a great musical instrument store where I found the perfect semi-acoustic guitar so I bought it for myself as a birthday present. The store didn’t have a hard case for it so I wrapped up the cardboard box it was in and prepared it for travel.

On my birthday Dingo and I took off. We debated about heading north to go to Germany, Norway, and Sweden but the weather up there was horrible so we decided to head to a surf competition on the Southern Atlantic coast of France where we knew it would be warm. Outside of Budapest we were picked up by a guy in a beat up car with enough room for the three of us, our things, and about two square inches left over for breathing room. The guy had just spent the last year in a Romanian prison for drug trafficking and was on his way to Portugal to see his family. He was heading all the way to Torino, Italy and although it was cramped and uncomfortable we went with him the whole way stopping in Tarvisio (where I began my hike through the Alps) for a nice birthday dinner. Switching off driving throughout the night we arrived in Torino at about 5 a.m. the following morning. After catching about two hours of sleep at the back of a gas station Dingo and I began hitching again. We caught several small rides through the Italian Alps and into France. South of Toulouse we caught a ride with a French guy and his girlfriend who had just come back from Morocco with cartons upon cartons of cigarettes. He was buying them cheap down there and selling them in France along with other substances he picked up there. He offered to give us a ride all the way to Hossegor where the surf competition was for fourteen euros. We figured that was a good amount for gas and everything, although fourteen is a weird amount to request, so we agreed. About three hours later around 2:30 in the morning we arrived at the beach. We got out of the car and gave the guy 20 euros since he went through a lot of trouble trying to find the place and we figured he could keep the other 6 euros. He looked at me and said, “Where’s the other 20?” I asked him what he was talking about, that he demanded 14 euros but he claimed that we had agreed upon 40. We thought that 14 was a weird number but before we agreed I tried clarifying with him that it was indeed 14 euros and he agreed on that. Well we gave him the last of our money which was another 7 euros and he went on his way. Dingo and I then crashed on the beach to the sound of the ocean surf. We awoke a few hours later to hot sun with sand in our sleeping bags and ocean spray hitting our faces. We got up and starting checking out the small surf city. By noon clouds rolled in and the wind picked up. It became cold and threatened to rain. We were walking up the boardwalk when we met to young dudes from Southern California who were quite typically SoCal. They invited us to stay with them in the small hostel place they were staying as there were only two of them but they had five beds in the place. So we took our stuff over there and hung out with them for the rest of the evening. They were kind enough to buy us food and drinks throughout the night and provide us with a roof over our heads which was very fortunate as it rained a lot that evening and the next morning.

When noon arrived on the following day and the weather hadn’t gotten any better, nor with the weather forecast would it, we made the decision to head south into Spain. Walking down the road with our things I stuck my thumb out and immediately someone pulled over and gave us a lift. We got a couple rides soon after that including one that then we were picked up by two really cute French girls heading to San Sebastian. They asked if we wanted to go and naturally we gave them an enthusiastic “yes”. Upon arrival in San Sebastian we found a large fiesta going on and joined in the fun. We spent the night dancing and partying like it was 1999. At about 5 in the morning we decided it was time to get some sleep. We snuck into a giant mountain park by scaling a 12 foot high wall that curved around the gate with steps worn into it. We then climbed up the mountain overlooking the town and found a great spot to set up camp. We slept about and hour before we were awakened by rain pouring down on our heads. If you have never been woken up by rain after an hour of sleep I must tell you it is an awful experience, trust me. Dingo and I were both in a fowl mood so we went our separate ways for awhile. I went to a beautiful church to meditate and pray then found a guitar case, finally, ate some food, checked email and things then went to find Dingo. I had no idea where he was so I just wandered in the direction I thought he might be saying to myself that if I find him, great, if not, oh well we’d probably meet up later. Walking down the road a tall blond guy stopped me and asked in English if I was looking for someone. He told me that my friend was in the internet café on the corner so I walked in and found Dingo. Had the guy not stopped me to tell me I might have never found him. I told Dingo about it and he didn’t recall mentioning looking for me to anyone that morning… weird. We relaxed on a bench around the corner and I pulled out my guitar to play it for the first time since I had bought it nearly a week prior. We had siesta on the sidewalk then walked around the city a bit to check it out. When evening came around we watched a spectacular fireworks display then ran into a young couple from the Czech Republic drinking cheap wine next on a bench with their giant backpacks at their side. They didn’t have a place to sleep that night so we invited them to stay at our “Mountain Hotel” since it was a clear night and didn’t look like it would rain. It was still too early to sneak into the park so they invited us for a couple drinks. They and Dingo drank some beer while we watched a Basque dance party. The bands played Basque folk music to an upbeat tempo while the young and old performed traditional dances together. When the time had arrived to head to the mountain the Czech guy, Adam, was pretty smashed. We found our way to the gate and Dingo and I proceeded to scale the wall again. We turned around the corner behind the gate and waited for a few minutes. When the other two didn’t show up we decided to investigate. We dropped our bags then went back around the corner. We found Adam lying on the ground below the highest part of the wall unconscious with his girlfriend hovering nervously above him. He was still breathing and after about a minute he woke up with a chipped tooth and no memory of the incident but with no other injuries. Since he was drunk and had a heavy bag on his back when he fell he was relaxed and the bag absorbed the impact. We half-carried half-walked him up the mountain to our sleeping spot. While they got settled Dingo and I checked out the view from our place and saw the lights of the city down below along with the darkness of the bay. We slept quite soundly that night to awake the following morning to sunshine and a loud Italian guy singing above us at the top of his lungs. Adam was fine but still couldn’t remember what happened. We spent a little while basking in the sunshine and absorbing the view of the beautiful sights below us. Deciding to head out of the city that day and head to Portugal we took the couple to the train station so they could make their way back to Prague. Dingo and I then made the attempt to leave San Sebastian.

With no luck hitchhiking along the freeway we caught a bus for a euro that took us just outside the city. We then caught a ride with a guy in a camper who was heading to Madrid, so we figured, why not go to Madrid. We arrived in Madrid yesterday afternoon and checked out the city for awhile. Although we had no intention of coming to Madrid I’m glad we came. This is a gorgeous city though huge and would recommend it to anyone. Last night while searching for a place for Dingo to perform and earn some cash we came across a giant park. We heard many drums and cheers coming from a section of the park and headed towards the music. Upon arrival we found a huge drum circle with about 50 people or so drumming, dancing, drinking, and just having a good time. We joined in and Dingo performed for the crowd. We hung out for awhile meeting really cool people. That night we slept in the park but were brought out of our slumber quite suddenly by sprinklers. It isn’t as bad as being awakened by rain but its pretty close. We found another area as dawn was approaching and caught another hour or so of sleep before the park security woke us up and told us we had to leave. Now we are on our way to Grenada to see what the artistic city holds. After that I will be heading to a hippie commune about an hour south of there and I think I might stay there for awhile. So if I do not post again for a long time, do not fear, I am in safe hippie hands. Until next time, adios!

Budapest: The enlightened rodent

2007-08-05T08:27:00.000-06:00

While reading the following entry one may notice something missing compared to the other entries. This text has no accompanying photos. Your first guess to why is probably the correct one. A couple nights ago as I was sleeping someone went through my bag right under my nose and took my camera and mp3 player without my being aware. The mp3 player I don’t really care about and the camera itself isn’t that important, however there were photos on there that cannot be replaced and it is for these photos that I mourn.

The last two weeks have been quite eventful as you might imagine. After spending a few days sleeping on the couch of the apartment in Tricesimo Italy, biking through the hills and eating gelato I decided it was time to be off onto my next adventure. I chose to hike through the Alps of northern Italy into Austria. Adequately preparing myself for such a journey I bought a small camping stove, a cooking pot, rice, hard plastic utensils, and snickers bars, you know the essentials. In Tarvisio (a small town just south of the Austrian border) I bought a hiking map to help plan my route. Wednesday morning I left the small hotel room I had stayed in the previous night and started hiking. After about two hours on my feet I reached the Austrian border and walked right across. From there I took a gorgeous trail following the ridge of the Carnic Alps. Beautiful jagged mountain tops greeted me around corners while I was surrounded by huge pine trees and the songs of birds echoing through the forest. I came across mountain streams of fresh spring water about every hour or so where I could refill my water bottle and refresh myself with a quick splash to the face. During the day I would push myself from sunup to sundown only stopping for a quick rest by a mountain stream or to pick wild raspberries along the trail. When evening came I would set up my tent and write in my journal by the fading light of dusk while waiting for my rice to cook and listening to my growling stomach. For three and a half days I hiked finally arriving in St Jakob, Austria around noon on the fourth day. The afternoon of the third day and the morning of the fourth were very difficult for me. For some reason it seemed that every road I chose led me in the wrong direction. Now I wouldn’t say that I am an expert navigator but I do know how to follow a map and I have a fairly good sense of direction. Even with the map I continually chose wrong routes or missed turn offs having to turn around and make my way back several times. As in the desert of France I was about two thirds of my way to my goal but just could not get there. Even when I had reached the small village just outside of St Jakob it seemed that the roads I chose only led me around in circles. Finally, after hours of mindless wandering I arrived at my destination. I took a trip to the grocery store to buy anything that wasn’t rice then lay in the grass under the afternoon sun relaxing and eating fresh fruit.

From St Jakob I hitchhiked my way to Vienna, Austria to see what the city had in store for me. I made it there with a few hours of daylight left so after calling my parents to let them know I was still alive I took a small tour of the city. I set up camp under a tree in a park and slept quite soundly. The next morning I arose and started wandering around the city taking in the sights and sounds. I walked through the beautiful gardens taking my time to stop and smell the roses, literally. The botanical garden had so many rosebushes each with a unique look and smell. I had no idea so many different kinds of roses existed. After my garden tour I laid in the grass of a nearby park and fell fast asleep. What must have been a few hours passed as when I awoke the shadows of the surrounding buildings and statues were significantly longer. I got up, grabbed my sack and continued on down the road. I entered an area known as the Museum Quarter, a group of more modern buildings where more of the local Viennese hang out. While passing by some benches a large guy with tattoos and a shaved head called out to me and told me to come over. I walked over to him and he started speaking to me with his heavy Australian accent. The man’s name was Dingo, or so people call him, and he has been touring Europe and other places for the last two years performing as a fire breather. I hung out with him for awhile and we were shortly joined by a Hungarian and a Czech whom Dingo had met the previous day. The Czech was a young guy named Roland who had been living on the streets for God knows how long. The Hungarian was a beekeeper whom we called “T” as we couldn’t pronounce his real name. He was also living on the streets of Vienna and new the ins and outs of getting everything for free there. We went to the main square and spent the afternoon watching break dancers, jugglers, and magicians entertain the tourists. That evening T took us to a small park where several other people were gathered. At about 8 o’clock a van pulled up and started serving free hot soup and bread. Although I have volunteered at soup kitchens it is a completely different experience to eat at one, especially one like this. Being surrounded by other homeless people asking for more soup to satisfy their hunger is an incredible experience that not many people would choose to try. It was pretty nice to eat and have live entertainment without paying a cent. That night we slept in the foyer of a museum on leather couches with carved faces looking down on us from the ceiling.

We awoke the following morning to rain and cold outside the foyer. Dingo and I packed our things and caught a bus that afternoon to Bratislava, Slovakia. Dingo was to play drums in a band there on Thursday but we decided to head up early to check out the city. Before going there, had you asked me where Slovakia was I would have replied, “Over there” and pointed my finger in any arbitrary direction. We arrived in Bratislava Monday afternoon to be greeted by an empty city. There were no tourists and most of the locals were on vacation or something because the capital city of Slovakia seemed like a ghost town. We wandered around for a couple hours then decided to get some food. We went to the grocery store and bought fresh vegetables, beans, bread, and drinks for the equivalent of about two euros. Searching for a place to cook with my camping stove out of the wind we walked down an alley and found some unused tables and chairs at the back of a restaurant. People passed by looking at us but no one said anything until the owner of the restaurant came out and started speaking to us in Slovak. Dingo stood up and said he was Australian and that he didn’t understand a word the guy was saying. The man switched to English and told us that we couldn’t stay there because his customers walked past that spot to use the toilet. He helped us move around the corner setting us up with a table and a couple chairs. He left for a minute and came back with a beer for each of us. We talked with him for a time while our food cooked and it turns out that he spent a lot of time in Australia and loves it there. After we finished our meal he invited us out to his front patio for a couple more beers. We drank and talked, Dingo performed a fire show in front of the restaurant, we drank some more and just had a great time that evening. We finally said goodnight and Dingo and I took off to find a place to sleep. We found a small copse of trees where there was no foot traffic as it was by the highway and we figured it’d be a good spot to set up camp. We laid out our sleeping bags and were soon fast asleep. I awoke in the middle of the night to hear the sounds of wrestling near by. I sat up and saw Dingo holding a guy against a tree. The guy was yelling something in Slovak and Dingo was yelling in Aussie, neither understanding the other. I looked at my bag right by my head and noticed it was wide open with many of my things strewn about the place then looked at Dingo’s to see the same of his. The man was emptying his pockets trying to show that he hadn’t taken anything. Dingo searched him and found that he in fact hadn’t. After attempting to tell the man that stealing was wrong and that it wasn’t a good way to go through life he let the guy go, obviously terrified. I searched through my bag and noticed that both my mp3 player and camera were missing. We believe that somebody had come up before this guy, searched through my bag without me hearing, took the electronics, and left before this other guy came up seeing that we were easy targets and tried the same. Obviously he wasn’t as skilled as the other guy because Dingo heard him and woke up right away before he could take anything. We attempted to go back to sleep but I don’t think either of us actually slept at all after that. I woke up the next morning in a pretty bad funk trying to tell myself that it was only “stuff” and things could have been a lot worse. Dingo generously gave me a camera that he had been in possession of for awhile that only needed some slight repair. That morning we decided to go sightseeing at the castle but as much as I tried to enjoy it, it seemed that nothing would sink in at all. While at the castle we met a young Austrian woman traveling on her own so she joined us as we toured the town. As she and Dingo talked the day through about Australia and life ambitions I felt tuned out. I had that sinking feeling of abandonment again and that I was really in need of guidance. After a while things settled down and I moved into a complacent state. Dingo wanted to check out the club where he would be performing so that evening him and I left Tenya (the Austrian) and made our way to the abandoned bunker under the castle that had been renovated into the SubClub.

Upon arrival at the venue we met the only two people there that evening, the bartender and a DJ. They invited us in and the bartender poured us a couple of shots and gave us a few beers. Me, I’m not much of a drinker so by the time we left the SubClub about two hours later I was already feeling pretty pissed. The bartender locked up after us and started walking with us in the direction of the old city. He told us to come with him and led us into downtown Bratislava. We walked into an alley then down some stairs into another bar where he greeted the waitress with a big kiss. We sat up at the bar and he ordered us a round of beers. He offered Dingo and I a shot of some kind of crazy Slovakian drink but I refused as politely as possible. After he and Dingo had a few more shots and the three of us had had about four more beers we stumbled out onto the streets of Bratislava. The bartender said goodbye and pointed us in the right direction to god knows where. Dingo and I, barely conscious, wandered down the streets stumbling with every step until Dingo said, “This looks good”. We were at the corner of an old building right across from the main church. We subsequently passed out on the cobblestones not waking until the sun was beating down on us and tourists were staring at the two drunken hobos in the street. We sat there waving and saying “good morning” as the people in the little tourist tram took pictures of us. Finally the heat and light of the morning sun became unbearable to our aching heads and we moved into the shade of the church outcroppings When I felt up to it I went to the market to pick up some good hangover food and checked my email at the local tourist office. I received an email saying that my friend Sarah, in Budapest, was going to be home for the next couple days and I was welcome to come crash on her couch. After feeding Dingo and myself I told him that I was leaving and that if he was coming to Hungary after the band played he should let me know. I packed up my gear and headed out of town determined to hitch my way the 200 km or 125 miles to Budapest within the next couple hours. After five hours of waiting at freeway entrances and walking down the highway itself I was finally picked up by a Hungarian who spoke fluent English. He brought me all the way to Budapest and I showed up at Sarah’s door late that evening to be greeted by her roommate. I spent the next couple days relaxing with Sarah, her husband Peter, and their roommate Sanyi. Sarah and I went to the market, saw the new Harry Potter movie, went to the library, and saw bits and pieces of the city. I told them about Dingo and how he wanted to come to Budapest. As wonderful as they are they invited him to stay with them as well though they didn’t even know him. Dingo arrived Friday evening and shared a delicious meal with us as it was Peter’s birthday. Sarah left the following morning for America but Sanyi and Peter invited us to stay as long as we want. So here I am with a roof over my head in Budapest reading Sarah’s copy of the final Harry Potter book. The simplest things in life, such as sleeping on a couch, taking a shower, washing clothes, eating a hot meal etc. have become the greatest pleasures. I have now been on the road for over a month but am not close to stopping. I love this life and hope to be able to continue for as long as I want. Thank you for all your prayers and support, it really helps. Until next time, Szia!

French Desert and Public Humiliation

2007-07-22T15:14:00.000-06:00

After a hot days bike ride in the northern Italian countryside I sit with the cool evening breeze caressing my face and drink fresh squeezed apple juice while reflecting on the last two weeks। After spending a few days in Pamplona with people who embrace the culture and festivities of San Fermin I realized a couple of things। The main thing I discovered was that before coming here I had no idea what this was about। I had actually participated in a protest against something I had never previously even encountered। By doing so I was doing something I genuinely dislike and that is imposing my beliefs and my ideas on a people outside of my own culture। As much as I enjoyed running nearly naked through the streets of Pamplona I don’t think I will participate in another protest like that again। I do not want to assume that my way is the best for everyone। That is my biggest pet peeve in this world and something I constantly struggle against in my own life। Once a few days had passed I was growing restless and ready to trek northward. I discovered a trail that ran straight through Pamplona on its way to Santiago, Spain. Pilgrims have been taking this trail for a thousand years to visit the remains of St. James whose bones were miraculously transported by angels from Palestine to Eastern Spain by boat. The trail actually begins in Paris, France and travels down through France into Spain. Most people these days do not walk the entire length of the trail but some do walk from Southern France to the end taking about a month to do so. Seeing as how I didn’t want to head in the direction of Eastern Spain I decided to walk the trail backwards. As David said, it was like going to Mecca by walking away from it. I packed up my sack, said my goodbyes and headed out the door. Walking the trail backwards was considerably more challenging than I thought it would be as all the signs pointed in the direction of Santiago, not France. Every time I came to a trailhead of three or four directions I could tell where I had come from but not the direction in which I wanted to go. I ended up wasting a lot of time by backtracking on numerous occasions. The trail was also uphill the entire way since I was heading directly into the Pyrenees. I arrived the first night into the small town of Zubiri, Spain built mainly around the pilgrimage. I stayed the night in a bunk surrounded by 35 pilgrims making their way towards Santiago. I was the only one heading to France, where everyone else had come from. The next morning I got an early start and trudged along throughout the day, again backtracking to find the right trail several times. As the day was drawing its end for me and I was about to find a place to pitch my tent in the next village I came across two other guys heading in my direction. The first was shirtless with long blond dreadlocks and shoes so tattered one could look directly through them had his feet not been inside. The other guy was wearing a long skirt and carried a gnarled walking stick also with long tangled dreads. I found out that the blond bloke was a chap from England named Dave and the other was an Israeli going by the moniker, Aviram. I started talking to them along the road and discovered that they had just spent the last three months in a hippie commune in Southern Spain where they exchanged goods and services for food and other things they needed. They were on their way to France so Dave could catch a plane back to England. I asked them where they were camping for the night and they replied that they weren’t sure yet. They were going to press on into the mountains. In the valley where we were the sun had already begun to set behind the mountains so I thought they were crazy to continue on but I figured, what the hell, I’d join them. We started hiking this trail that wound its way up and up and up the side of the mountain and as the hours progressed we climbed higher and higher. I discovered that day that when my entire body goes numb I can walk about another 3 kilometers before passing out from fatigue. David and Aviram kept pushing me to continue on. Finally, after an exhaustive climb we ended up at the summit of the mountain overlooking the rest of the Pyrenees and the valleys below just in time to set up camp and watch the most beautiful sunset I had ever seen. The sun cast its light among the various mountain peaks as the clouds settled in between them. Seeing this from above was awe-inspiring. We built a fire and they were kind enough to share the food they had with me. Once darkness completely descended upon us I could see more stars above me than I could have ever imagined. Having no lights of any city nor any trace of the moon we could revel in the utter blackness of the night sky filled with those innumerable stars and galaxies. In distant Pamplona we saw the fireworks spectacular they put on every night. What an amazing evening, and had I not pushed myself to climb the entire way with Dave and Aviram I would have missed it. Upon awaking the next morning we started our descent into France among gale-force winds followed by blistering heat. Through the Pyrenees we came across herds of sheep numbering in the hundreds and wild horses standing defiantly against the wind. By the afternoon we had made it to our destination of St. Jean Pieds du Port in Southern France. We celebrated by buying fresh fruit, bread, and other amenities which we promptly devoured. After a nice rest in the park, under the shade of the birch trees, we parted ways. They were hitching their way north and I was headed east. Quickly and easily I managed to hitch a ride in the right direction. Although they were not going far they explained to me the best route to head out of the region. Soon after they dropped me off I was picked up again and taken slightly further down the road. After getting out of the truck I stuck out my thumb and started walking in the right direction. Shortly thereafter a young guy picked me up and took me all the way past Toulouse to the town where he lived. That night I pitched camp by the river side listening to the water flow softly by my head and lapping against the rocks of the riverbed. The next morning I awoke at first light to hitch my way east. I was picked up by some really great people and got pretty far. By the end of the day I was nearly to Marseille. North of Marseille a guy in a windowless van pulled over and offered me a lift. I hopped in and learned that he was a comedian from Paris whose ten month old son and girlfriend live in Marseille. Driving down into the city we had a great talk and he invited me to shower at his place and sleep in his van parked outside their apartment. Not only did he and his girlfriend provide me with a shower and place to sleep but they fed me as well. How fortunate I was to meet this man. They also recommended a trail that went from Marseille to a town further down the coast, Cassis. Estimating that it was between 15 and 20 miles I figured I could easily do that in a day so in the morning I bought a little fruit, filled up my water bottle, and caught the bus to the start of the trail. At the head of the trail was a little map that showed the route along the Mediterranean to Cassis and below the map was a little table that said Cassis was between four and five hours away. I thought to myself that this would be easy. I should have realized right away that it would be considerably more difficult than I had imagined as within the first fifteen minutes I lost the trail and had to backtrack a few times to find it. The trail wound its way up and around the mountain into an elevated desert above the Med. I walked for a couple hours, eating my fruit and drinking my water, before I stopped at a little rocky beach just off the path. I relaxed for about an hour, playing in the sand and swimming in the water, and then took off again. A couple hours later I realized that I had been walking well over five hours and there was no sign of Cassis. I managed to find another person on the trail walking in the opposite direction and asked him if he had come from Cassis. He stared at me with a bewildered look on his face and told me that I was a long way from Cassis, at least eight hours walking distance. My jaw dropped. I ate the last of my fruit on the beach and was pretty much out of water by then. The man was gracious enough to fill up my water with what he had. He gave me a couple bonbons and pointed me in the right direction. I continued on as it was either walk eight hours to Cassis and complete my small quest or turn around and walk seven hours back to Marseille, so of course I chose to continue on. Climbing the great hills of a French Mediterranean desert I had no idea if I would have enough water for the rest of the journey. The day was hot and I had a long way to go. As the sun was setting I came across a bicyclist who frequented the area and knew a great path to Cassis even going so far as to recommend where to camp for the night. He told me that when I came to a fork in the road I could take a shorter path or a slightly longer, but much prettier path to Cassis. I made my way towards the fork and actually camped out at the junction determined to make the decision in the morning. Waking up refreshed after a good night’s sleep I decided on the slightly longer but prettier route. I began the ascent into the mountain climbing steep rocks in between jagged boulders. When I arrived at the top I had a gorgeous view of the sea. Continuing up another hill I reached the top and could see the city of Cassis far below. I chose a road that took off in that direction and began my descent. Coming to several forks in the road I continually chose whichever path lead in the direction of Cassis. After about an hour of walking, the path I was on came to a complete dead end, I mean cliff face dead end. So I turned around and chose another path only to find another dead end. I turned around again to choose yet a different path that only wound its way around to meet up at the same junction. This continued on for about three hours under the blistering noonday sun in the parched desert with scarcely a drop of water. For the first time in my life I felt abandoned and hopeless. I fell to the dry earth crying and desperately calling to God for help. No one as far as the eye could see. My destination so close at hand but unreachable. Running out of water and having a thirst that I cannot even describe in words. This was the absolute most difficult moment of my entire life. Still, I picked myself up and decided to create my own path to Cassis. I saw power lines heading in the direction of the city so I made my way in that direction. Cutting my way through sharp bushes and stumbling along the loose, jagged rocks, I half-walked, half-fell into a ravine. Raising my head I looked up to see a blue and yellow marking signifying a trail. Finding new strength I stumbled along the path. After about fifteen minutes I found myself in a dirt parking lot surrounded by cars. It was the entrance to a public beach and right across the parking lot was a drink stand. I practically ran to the stand and ordered the biggest bottle of water the guy had and a melon popsicle. I had never tasted water so cold and refreshing nor had I tasted a sweeter popsicle. I asked the guy how to get to Cassis and he pointed to the road next to us saying that it was a fifteen minute walk in that direction. I was overjoyed! After the popsicle and bottle of water I took off down the road to finally arrive in Cassis. I went to the nearest grocery store and bought so much food and drink I had to remove many things from my sack to make room for it all. I collapsed right outside the grocery store drinking a liter of orange juice and eating fruit left and right. I passed out right there for about an hour then decided to get the hell out of that town. I made my way to the main road and stuck my thumb out. I got a ride all the way to Toulon, France where I camped out in a small park for the night. The highway leaving Toulon was not well suited for hitchhiking so I checked out the train station. I found a train leaving for Nice and was on it as soon as possible. In Nice I walked to the beach and lay out on the rocks for a few hours. Swimming in the cool water of the Mediterranean was bliss. After spending the day in Nice I hitched my way out of the city and into western Italy. A nice family picked me up and dropped me off in the outskirts of a tiny Italian town called San Remo. I spent about 2 hours trying to catch a ride by the freeway entrance before the sun went down and I had to walk down the hill to find a camping spot. After spending the night among weeds and highway rubbish I woke up and started my way back up the hill. After about three more hours of waiting I was finally picked up by a nice Albanian guy. He took me about 20 kilometers down the road and dropped me off at a major junction. Soon thereafter I was picked up by a really cool Spanish guy who took me all the way to Pisa. Since I hadn’t really eaten much that day I decided to spend the rest of my cash on a nice hot meal of mushroom risotto. It was delicious. I was now faced with the problem of having no spending cash, however, and had to conceive a means by which to obtain some. Sitting beneath the leaning tower I decided to try my hand a public humiliation. I stood up in front of the crowd, put my bandanna on the ground with a few loose coins I still had, and started singing. After working up the courage to belt out that first note, the rest came easily. I sang for a good half hour and had a few bouts of applause from people sitting in the plaza. In that half hour I made about six Euros in spare change. I bought myself some fruit for the morning and found a place to camp. The next day I tried hitching for about three hours with a sign saying “Firenze” (Florence to us crazy Americans) when an old lady on a bike stopped and said that there was a train to Firenze every hour. At least, that is what I thought she said as she was speaking Italian and I understand no Italian whatsoever. She probably said something like, “Bats fly under the cover of darkness because they are insecure about their big noses”. I went to the train station and found a train to Florence for five euros so I hoped on. Thirty minutes later I arrived in Florence and found a little guide book for a day’s visit in the city. I walked around soaking up the sights and sounds of this magnificent city until I came to a pedestrian bridge lined with shops and all sorts of venders. I thought this was the perfect place to try my hand again and I laid down my bandanna. The first note caught the attention of those around me and I continued on for about 45 minutes until the police told me to move on. In those 45 minutes I made over sixteen Euros! I’m thinking about quitting my day job (whatever that is). On my way to camp I stopped to listen to the Stanford Jazz Orchestra play for the American ambassador. I made my way down to the river bank where I set up my tent and had a terrific night’s sleep. Seeing as how my hitchhiking exploits hadn’t been as successful in Italy as they had been in Spain and Europe I decided to bite the bullet and just take a train from Florence to Tricesimo to meet up with Scott there. I arrived yesterday to have Scott and Ruth pick me up at the train station and take me back to the apartment where I took my first shower in a week. I had no idea water could be that dirty in a bathtub. After my shower we went to someone else’s house to eat and I swear I ate more than the other five people there combined. I felt as if I hadn’t had a proper meal in weeks, when in fact I hadn’t. That night I slept on the couch under the cover of bed sheets which I had actually forgotten the feel of. Today we went for a splendid bike ride in the hills of northern Italy and just had a magnificent time. This brings me to the present moment, surrounded by the beautiful Italian countryside in the company of great friends. Of the trials and tribulations of the past couple weeks I do not think. I revel in the beauty that is right now and the perfection of this instant. I am so glad to be here and am thankful of the time I have to relax in the company of great friends with a soft couch to lay on and a full stomach. Life does not get much better than this, my friends. Thank you for sharing it with me. Until next time, arrivederci!

Warning: Adult Content!

2007-07-07T21:12:00.000-06:00

Skipping stones along the Mediterranean surf while watching the blood red moon rise above the horizon I knew that this would truly be an inspiring journey. I left Paris Monday morning on a plane to Barcelona. Upon arriving in Barcelona I found myself homeless, phoneless, careless, and I couldn't be happier. I spent my first night on the beach of Barceloneta under the stars listening to the waves crash against the shore and feeling the salty ocean air fill my lungs. I awoke the following morning to see the most beautiful sunrise I had ever seen glide easily into the morning sky, alighting the clouds in shades of pink and orange that I never new existed. As the sun came over the crest of the horizon I made my way towards it into the sea. Swimming in the cold sea water without anyone around was an invigorating experience. After spending my first day and night on the beaches of Barcelona I strapped my bag to my back and headed around town. What a beautiful city. From the topless beaches to the Gothic quarter to the beautiful parks and floral gardens, I was enjoying every minute of it. I spent the following night camped out in a beautiful park right near the entrance to the highway with hopes that in the morning I could hitch a ride to Pamplona from there. That night I took a shower at one of the various water fountains in the park. I must say that bathing from a park fountain was a novel experience for me, as it would be for most, and it was quite humbling not having the warmth of a household heated shower.

Wednesday morning I rose with the sun again, this time seeing it illuminate the entire city from my position in the elevated garden. I packed up my things, hoped the gate (as the park had been closed and locked up during the night apparently), and made my way down to the highway. I began walking northwest with a cardboard sign I made with "Pamplona" written on one side and "Zaragoza" written on the other thinking that I could find a ride heading in the direction of the closer city easier than to my ultimate destination. After walking backwards with my thumb out for about 2 hours I made it about 5 kilometers outside the city when I realized that hitching a ride on the freeway was probably not going to work out too well. I went into the town and found a phone. I called the bus driver who was taking people from Barcelona to Pamplona for the protest and he told me that they had already left about two hours previous. Had I called him right after I woke up I could have easily gotten a ride all the way, but alas I did not. So I caught a small regional train back into the city and made my way to the bus station. I discovered that there was a bus leaving for Pamplona at 3:00 but that it was booked solid and there was not another bus leaving that day. So I made my way to the train station. After standing in line for a good hour I arrived at the ticket counter and asked for a train to Pamplona. I got a ticket on the next train available leaving at 10 o'clock that evening and arriving at my destination at 5:30 the next morning. I spent the next 9 hours wandering around Barcelona a little more until it was time to leave. I hopped on the train and was thrown into a sleeper car with 5 big Kiwi guys. With the various sounds and noises only 6 guys can make together and with the gentle rocking of the train I was soon fast asleep to arrive in Pamplona when I awoke.

I spent Thursday morning walking the quiet and peaceful streets of this beautiful city. At noon I met up with the other people participating in the Running of the Nudes. I threw my bag into the back of one of the vans and stripped off my clothes. The first two years of the protest people went completely naked, then the mayor of the city passed a law stating it was illegal to be completely nude within city limits. This unfortunately meant that we had to at least wear underwear. I grabbed one of the various thongs from a box and threw them on only to discover that they were intended for use by women and they barely covered anything. Oh well, at least I had something on down there. At one o'clock we began the march through the town, down the same route the bulls and runners would take during the next week. Flashing banners and bodies while shouting "Toros: ci! Toreros: no!" attracted a fair amount of attention. People watched from balconies and side streets, some even stripping and joining us. Most spectators smiled broadly and waved but some made obscene gestures. After an hour and a half of marching under the hot sun we arrived at the large doors to the bull fighting arena. Banging on the doors we posted our signs upon it that displayed various saying such as "Bullfighting is bullshit!" and "Out with the old, in with the nude". The march was a lot of fun and hopefully someday it might be a great alternative for the city to watching large animals being tortured to death for the amusement of the crowd.

Following the protest I caught a ride with one of the buses back to the campgrounds where the Running of the Nudes participants were staying. Out in the countryside on a lake this was the perfect spot to spend my next two nights. I had an amazing time meeting extraordinary people, swimming in the lake and sunbathing along its shore, dancing the night away, and eating vegan meals. The people I met were phenomenal. Of course they were open minded individuals who really like working for good causes. I was with my kind of people.

Friday morning I woke up early to catch a ride with a bus heading back towards Pamplona but not going into the city. They were going to drop me off on the outskirts where I could just head into town from there. While riding on the bus I was talking with some really interesting Swedish guys when one of them looks at his watch and says, "Man its taking awhile to get to Pamplona. Usually it only takes about 45 minutes and we've been on the road for nearly an hour and a half." So I went down to ask the bus driver what was going on and he looks at me and say, "I completely forgot. We are now about sixty kilometers north of the city." They dropped me off at the next town, gave me a coke and bottle of water, and wished me luck. I walked over to the entrance of the freeway heading in the opposite direction, sat down on my bag, stuck my thumb out, and waited. 45 minutes passed before a man pulls up and told me in Spanish that he was only going about 4 kilometers but I could hop in. I figured 4 km was farther than I had traveled in the previous 45 minutes and took him up on his offer. Since he didn't speak English or French and since I didn't speak any Spanish we had a very lively conversation. He dropped me off, sure enough, exactly 4 km down the road. As soon as he took off down a side street I stuck out my thumb and was immediately picked up by a guy driving 20 km further. The same language situation ensued and there was a lot of silence for the next 20 km. After I got out and thanked the guy I started walking along the highway with my thumb in the now instinctively placed position. About 30 minutes passed when a guy pulled over and told me to hop in. Not only did this guy not speak either French or English but he didn't even speak Spanish. Ten minutes into the drive he said, "Polski discotheque" and turned on the radio. Blaring through the speakers came the sounds of techno with an eastern european feel, meaning that they said the same two english words over and over thinking that they were cool words such as "Burning cathair, burning cathair". Finally we arrived in Pamplona and I found my way to the house where I would be staying with some very generous friends.

Walking around the packed city on Saturday was nearly impossible. People were shoulder to shoulder, wall-to-wall in some places. Broken beer bottles, torn clothing, puke, and piss littered the streets. After watching the spectacular fireworks display I headed back to the house for a good night's sleep. The noise of the streets forced its way into the apartment making it nearly impossible to fall into slumber. Singing, musical instruments, and voices amplified by megaphones filled the night air, reverberating off the walls of the narrow streets making it that much louder. Thankfully I was so tired that I passed out from exhaustion shortly after my head hit the pillow.

This morning I awoke at the break of dawn to watch the Running of the Bulls from a balcony along the street. This event has been ongoing for centuries and is a huge part of the cultural heritage of Spain. Here in Pamplona, because of Hemingway, the event has become world renowned and people come from all over the globe to run along side the bulls. Thousands of people littered the streets as the chill morning air held the tinge of excitement. All of a sudden I heard the explosion from the rocket signaling the release of the bulls and everybody started running. After about a minute I looked down the road and saw 13 huge bulls coming around the corner. As I watched they came running right below the balcony chasing hundreds of people to the arena. Within seconds they had passed. Although the run is an interesting event to witness I don't think I could ever go to one of the fights. I have been invited but I promptly declined. I spent the day wandering around with my aunt Stacey and David soaking up the sights and sounds of San Fermin. I then had my siesta nap and that brings me to now.

As far as where I will go next, I am not quite certain. There is a pilgrimage trail that leads north from here into southern France. I think I will remain in Pamplona for a few more days and then head to the trail. This first week of my journey has been absolutely amazing. I really appreciate this beginning as it helps me have faith in the rest of the quest. I know things will happen exactly as they are meant to, exactly as they have this week as well as throughout my entire life. Thank you all for your constant thoughts, prayers, and support. It helps a great deal and I really appreciate it. So, until the next time, Peace!

The Countdown Begins

2007-05-26T15:50:00.000-06:00

I have a month left in Paris before I hit the open road. Officially I leave on July 2nd but unofficially my mind is already gone. On July 2nd I will hop on a plane to Barcelona, Spain. From there I will hitchhike over to Pamplona and will hopefully be there before the 5th because that is the day the protest begins.

I will be participating in a protest against the bullfighting as watching animals being tortured to death is not my idea of a good time. The protest is called the Running of the Nudes and I hope it becomes the new yearly tourist attraction of Pamplona so they don't have to rely on the bullrunning for their touristic revenue. The plan is to stay in Pamplona for a few days then head out.

After Pamplona I'm not sure exactly where I'll be going or how I'll get there. I will go wherever the wind blows me and discover my paths along the way. I would love to make it over to the Tibet region of China and perhaps study under some Tibetan monks for awhile. The next time any of you see me I might be in orange robes with a shaved head, but I'm not too sure how that look will go on me.

I am so excited for this venture that I have to change my pants every time I think about it (my laundry basket is rather full right now). I will try to update this blog as often as possible during my journey but I can make no promises. I may not be near a computer for months at a time but please feel free to stop in and check this out. As I prepare for this odyssey I keep my family and friends in my heart and mind. I love you all and will take you with me wherever I go.

Until next time,
William